


The Flatliners Club

by AsagiStilinski



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alive Laura Hale, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Hospital, Alternate Universe - Werewolves are still a thing, Coming back to life, Flatliners AU, Ghosts, Hallucinations, M/M, Magical Stiles Stilinski, sterekscenestealer3, sterekweek2017, the afterlife
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-26
Updated: 2017-10-26
Packaged: 2019-01-23 22:08:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 27,989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12517632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AsagiStilinski/pseuds/AsagiStilinski
Summary: "I need you to stop my heart,"Or: The Flatliners AU no one asked for





	The Flatliners Club

**Author's Note:**

> I got the blue slushie idea from The Good Doctor (hey, a medical drama I actually watch, imagine that) and the songs are 'Hungry Like The Wolf" by Duran Duran and "Lethargy" by Bastille
> 
> I know that it's actually a little short, I could have done more scares and resolved things a bit more slowly, but I REALLY did not have time =_=

"Can anyone tell me why the liver almost died?"

He hated Monday mornings

Morbidity And Mortality meetings that dragged on seemingly forever

But today's was almost over, it HAD to be right?

"Dr. McCall, can you give us an idea?"

He watched as the doctor in question went pale and rigid, a nervousness in his voice as he answered

"Um... it was warming up, I mean... the cooler, it was .. it was warming up,"

"Correct, and can you tell me why it didn't do any good to cool the organ by putting bags of frozen peas on top of it?"

"It... had to be submerged to raise the temperature, just cooling the top wouldn't work,"

"Excellent, now for our last case of the morning, can anyone tell me why a dog bite my be fatal? A perfectly healthy Pomeranian bit the leg of a perfectly healthy 45-year-old man and it nearly killed him, it took the hospital an hour to find out why, does anyone have any ideas?"

Immediately, the strawberry-blonde in the front row rose her hand high

"Anyone BESIDES Dr. Martin?"

There was a long pause of silence before he slowly raised his hand, biting the inside of his lip before speaking

"A dog allergy," he answered

"If the patient had a severe dog allergy and had an allergic reaction... it could be deadly enough to cause asphyxiation if left untreated,"

He watched a slight smile fall across the face of the doctor in the center of the room, nodding in approval at his answer

"Correct Mr. Hale," he finally said, stepping back towards the podium at the center of the room

'That's all for today, but I fully expect all of you to be able to do better next week, this is a teaching hospital, I expect for you to actually LEARN things, and to see more hands up at every question than just Dr. Martin's,"

The moment he had finished speaking, the doctor started gathering his pappers in silent dismissal, giving everyone the chance to leave, and giving Dr. Hale the time to put his plan into action

 

~+~

 

There was a quiet sound of sniffing coming from the break room, the man sitting there fiddling with an unopened can of soda looked exhausted, his eyes heavy with dark bags and face red-blotched, prominent against his dark tan skin

Derek felt a pang of sympathy as he walked around the corner and stepped into the room, sitting down carefully on the table in front of the other man

"Hey.... what's the matter?" he asked as gently as he could

The other man shook his head, fiddling with the tab on his can before finally deciding to just put it down on the table, head still bowed as he tried to choke back tears

"I don't think I'll ever get all of this," he said quietly

"I don't... think I'll ever be good enough, I can't retain anything, I can't keep up... I'm just... I'm just so tired... I don't think my brain can handle anymore,"

Derek reached out gently, carefully placing his hand over the other's and giving him a soft, warm smile

"Your shift ends pretty soon right?"

"It"s already over," he confirmed quietly

Derek forced his smile a little bit more, standing up and gently nudging his colleague's shoulder

"Come on, let me treat you to dinner,"

 

~+~

 

"You're not a failure Scott, medicine is an enormously difficult feild, and no one can be expected to remember everything,"

Scott seemed largely unconvinced of that

"How am I not? I... I can't handle any of this, EVERY Monday morning I end up looking like an idiot .. I never have any of the answers, I'm always having to consult others before I do anything around the hospital-"

"You knew that liver thing today," Derek pointed out

"Only because my best freind is the paramedic who fixed everything.... him and his... weird blue slushie idea,"

Derek paused, coffee cup half raised towards his mouth

"Your freind is the blue-slushie guy who saved the transplant?"

Scott only nodded, sighing quietly and hanging his head

"I just feel like everything is getting ahead of me, like everyone is getting past me, I'm not ... living up to everyone else... I can't keep track of anything, I'm losing sleep.... I'm gonna be horrible at this," he said with a low, long sigh, brushing his fingers up through his hair and hiding in his face in his wrists

Derek reached out somberly, very gently setting his hand on Scott's shoulder and giving it a soft squeeze

"Scott, you are going to be GREAT at this, ok? The technical skills... it's hard, it'll STAY hard, but it'll get easier over time, and you'll handle it, I swear, besides, technical skill isn't the only necessity in being a doctor, you have a talent that most people don't, I've never seen anyone with bedside manner like you,"

Scott's lips quirked up in a small, ghost of a smile, glancing out from between his fingers at the slightly older man in front of him

"You've never met Kira... have you?"

Derek smiled back, gently and warmly, and shook his head

"I haven't, actually, she's your girlfreind right?"

"Yeah... yeah she is, she's great,"

"Then I'd like to get to know her, why don't you both meet me tommorrow night in the hospital basement, at midnight, if you want some help with the tech stuff then... I'd be happy to let you in on a little .. private study program I'm doing,"

Scott stared at him, utterly shocked, and tilted his head

"Seriously?"

Derek gave a nod of his head, watching as the other resident shifted in his seat

"I... didn't know we were freinds,"

"Well, I TRIED to be your freind over a year ago and you blew me off...."

"Yeah I... I'm sorry, I just.. I didn't mean to blow you off, I was just overwelmed and-"

"And I'm willing to give it another shot, it's ok, I understand, so.... tommorrow?"

Scott gave a weak smile, nodding and turning back to his coffee

"Tommorrow,"

 

~+~

 

"Lydia, right?"

Slowly, the strawberry blonde glanced up at the man in front of her, thin eyebrows in a perfect raise as she assessed him

"That's right, and you're Derek Hale, emergency medicine, right? You've earned praise all the way up the ladder, as high as the hospital director, almost done with your residency... you'll have quite a reputation by the time you finish your residency,"

Derek allowed a small smirk to cross over his face as he slid into the chair across from Lydia, face soft and flirtatious as he responded

"And you're the top resident in the entire hospital, studying neurosurgery and already with favors from nearly every department here, you have the world at your feet.... but it gets stressfull being at the top doesn't it? One of those things where... you just need to blow off some steam?"

Lydia smirked back, closing the book she had been reading and setting it beside her on the table

"What did you have in mind?"

Derek smirked a little bit more, standing up from the cafeteria table, leaning against the chair and tilting his head

"Come to the basement tonight, you'll find out,"

Lydia smirked a little brighter, watching the other doctor walk away and allowing her gaze to travel down the length of his back, drinking him in for a short moment before turning back to her book

"You can count on it...."

 

~+~

 

"Hello? Derek? Are you down here?"

Scott probably shouldn't have decided to sneak down into a dark, abandoned, hospital basement at midnight just because a fellow doctor offered to help him improve his skills....

Hell it sounded almost like a bad "Just say no" ad from middle school if he actually thought about it

But now he and Kira were here and it seemed pointless to just... turn around before atleast knowing if Derek was down here to begin with

"Derek?" he called again, rounding a corner and letting out a yelp as he caught sight of a figure standing in the darkness

The figure, he realized with ease, was Derek

"Derek.... you scared the hell out of us," Scott said with a relieved sigh, squeezing Kira's hand a little tighter as she stepped closer to him

"Sorry, I didn't mean to," he replied vaguely, tapping in some numbers on a key pad and opening a door directly in front of him

"Well... not that sneaking around in the hospital basement after midnight isn't fun... but what are we doing down here exactly?" Kira asked, leaning a little bit closer to Scott as they reluctantly followed Derek further, hesitating at the door to the mystery room as their older companion stepped in to turn the lights on

"Did you know there's a fully functioning hospital down here? They built in case of emergency, a power outage, natural disaster, terrorist attack ... anything that would leave the upper part of the hospital useless or overflowing with patients,"

"That's... interesting..." Kira said slowly

Scott was busy watching the other doctor as he started moving around the room, tearing sheets off of this and turning on that

It was beginning to look alot less like some kind of study session and alot more like something illegal....

Scott wasn't entirely sure what they were going to do, or what Derek WANTED them to do, but it had his stomach churning just watching

"Problem is, nobody ever uses it, there's been no need, even though the equipment is in perfect working order, seems kind of like a waste doesn't it? Just letting it all sit here and collect dust?"

"You don't want us to help you steal it... do you?" Scott asked hesitantly

Derek paused, a deadpanned look of disbeleif on his face

"No,"

Scott wanted to ask more, but he heard footsteps starting down the stairs and his heart started to race, the already tight ball of nerves in his stomach only growing with more concern

"Someone's coming,"

"Dr. Martin, I know, she's just on time," Derek replied casually

Scott frowned a little bit more, starting to feel the anxiety coursing through him like waves

If Lydia was here, then they definitely weren't going to be having some sort of study session

Lydia was on another level than the rest of them, already knowing more than enough to fly through her residency without so much as a CHANCE at a red mark and already studying for her degree in neurosurgery, there was nothing any of them could teach her and it was a well-known fact that Lydia didn't do tutoring of any kind so... what could she be here for?

"Derek?" she asked sharply, clearly displeased- and a little surprised- as she stepped into the room

"I don't know what's going on here, but I'm not an orgy person, so either they leave, or I do,"

....

Wut

"You brought us here for sex?" Scott squeaked, a look of pure and utter horror and disgust on his face as his focus flickered between Lydia and Derek

"No, no one is here for sex," Derek frowned sharply, shrugging off his labcoat and tossing it in a corner

"I want to do an experiment, I want us to be able to prove something that no one else- no scholar, no doctor, no scientist, not even anyone in supernatural studies- has EVER been able to prove,"

"And what would that be?" Lydia asked almost boredly

"Life after death,"

All of a sudden, the air in the room, once jumbled and anxious and flurried, turned as still and stiff as a board, tense and so quiet that you could easily hear a pin drop

"How exactly are we going to prove that there's life after death when all of us are still alive? I'm a banshee, and even I don't know if there's life after death,"

"You just answered your own question, we can't prove anything as long as everyone is alive," Derek replied simply, starting to undo the buttons on his shirt

"Derek.... what the hell do you mean by that?" Scott breathed nervously

The older man glanced up, face stern and serious

"I need you to stop my heart,"

If possible, the air in the room only grew tenser

"Ok, this is the part where I call bull and walk out," Lydia said briskly, already turning on her heel

"Don't you want to know?" Derek nearly shouted, successfully bringing her to a pause, atleast for a moment

"Two werewolves, a kitsune, and as you yourself said a banshee... we all know more about the world than any human does but somehow none of us have this question answered, even those who are closest to death like you are have NO idea what's on the other side- or if there's even one at all, even banshees and hellhounds and other harbringers of death are in the dark about this, you only have what the rest of us have- stories that may or may not be true and blind faith, wouldn't you really like to know where your visions really come from? Wouldn't you like to present proof to the scientific world that something happens after we die? You could do that Lydia, you could do what no one else has EVER been able to do before you even turn thirty, don't you atleast want to try?"

She hesitated, standing by the doorway, Scott couldn't see what expression was on her face, but he could tell that she was torn in the the mixture of curiosity and anxiety lacing her scent, he wasn't sure what she was going to do, but ultimately....

"I'd rather make my discoveries by myself, and NOT have my medical license taken away for killing someone," she finally answered, her heels clicking against the cement floor as she walked out, leaving Derek, Scott, and Kira alone

Things were quiet for a moment, before finally Derek shrugged off the rest of his shirt and started walking towards the MRI scanner behind them before sitting down on the cot

"Well, guess it's up to you two then,"

Scott spun around on his heel, a look of panicked disbeleif on his face

"What do you mean 'it's up to us'? We aren't doing this!"

"Then I'll die," Derek replied casually, shrugging and pulling the crash cart closer to him

"What... you .. you mean 'die' as in.. with no plans to come back?" Kira asked anxiously

"Pretty much," Derek shrugged back, turning on the heart monitor next to the cart and grabbing the stickers he would need to attach to his chest

"You can't be serious," Kira breathed, nearly wimpered actually, wich compelled Scott to reach down and squeeze her hand, hoping to provide her with some sort of comfort

"As a heart attack," Derek answered- just as casual and stoic as always as he stuck the patches in their propper places

"You're crazy!"

"Probably,"

"Derek you can't do this," Scott snarled, trying his hardest to sound intimidating, though it probably didn't work nearly as well as he had hoped

Derek finally turned to look at them, seeming... almost sympathetic somehow, even as his hand lingered on the last patch

"For what it's worth, I'm sorry to put you in this position, but I'm going through with it weather you're here to revive me or not, I've already got the laptop set up and hooked up to the imaging headpeice on the table, all you guys have to do is save the results of the test and revive me after one minute, you're talented doctors, you can do this, I trust you,"

Derek's heartbeat was steady, usually Scott would be inclined to believe that meant he was telling the truth, but he had kept his heart rate steady since the night before when they were having coffee and the entire idea of helping Scott learn the ropes had been a complete lie so...

Clearly Derek knew how to do it

"What would the point be in all of this if you're just going to die though?" Kira asked, watching with a grimace as Derek grabbed the imaging headband from the table and started fitting it over his head

"As long as the computer doesn't shut down before someone finds me then the data will be collected, I don't have to be alive to appreciate it in order to think that it's a worth-wile venture,"

"Worth the cost of your life!?"

Derek paused, staring up at Kira as if she had just asked him the most rediculously simple question he had ever heard

"Easily,"

There was a heavy pause in the air, silence that stretched mostly between Kira and Scott as Derek reached down to grab the cooling blanket off of the bottom shelf of the crash cart

"I'm going to flatline," he said simply, eyes flicking up to Scott as he unfolded the blanket

"It's up to you guys if I come back from it or not,"

Scott was torn, not sure what to do, if he stayed wasn't he just giving Derek permission to go along with this crazy plan?

But if he left and Derek killed himself anyway then....

"Wait!" Kira shouted suddenly, pulling Derek's attention away from the defibilators he was reaching for

"What... what do we do?"

Apparently Kira was making this decision for them...

"I'm going to shock my heart, wait one minute after I flatline, then remove the cooling blanket and replace it with the warming blanket to bring my body temperature back up, after that start CPR, get the epi an-"

"We know how to bring someone back," Scott interrupted quickly, tensing his jaw

"I think... I think Kira meant...." he inhaled, glancing at the laptop sitting evenly on the table by the MRI scanner, watching the brain rythems being scanned into the computer as some sort of... distraction, maybe, he wasn't sure...

"Just monitor it, see if it records anything and make sure you save the results before you pull me out, just in case, I don't want you two getting cold feet and forgetting about it,"

Scott felt his stomach churn, fists clenching at his sides

The more detail Derek put into this, the more real it was becoming...

"I'll be fine, just as long as you two stick around to bring me back," he noted simply, taking a breath as he reached for the paddles again

"Wait!" Kira shouted again, causing Derek to pause one more time, an irritated look on his face as he turned his attention towards her

"What about the pain?"

"The pain is just a side-effect, I can handle it, werewolves have pretty strong constitutions remember? Though admittedly I'd been hoping Dr. Martin would agree to help so I could use propothal, but ... I'll work with what I have,"

"Then use it now," Scott said immediately

"I mean... look, we know you're going to do this so... so let us help you, ok? Just... just use the drugs, go to sleep, and we'll ... um... flatline you, it'll be painless!"

Derek looked... well, he looked ALMOST amused

"Scott, you're a terrible liar, I don't have to be a werewolf to see through that one,"

"So you trust us to bring you back to life but not to kill you?"

"You've got it," Derek smirked back

Scott wanted so badly to have a chance to say something else, but he didn't get the chance, Derek didn't give them any more chances to stop him before pressing the paddles to his chest and squeezing the triggers

And then it was... over?

Or.. maybe just beginning...

The heart monitor went from a steady beat to a flatline, and it took Kira jumping to action to run over and press her fingers to his throat

"He.... he's dead," she breathed, turning to stare at the other wolf over her shoulder, eyes wide with shock and fear

"He's dead...."

 

~+~

 

_Everything was bright and beautifull_

_He felt like he could see **everything** all of a sudden, like he was floating, like the world around him was bright and soft and so much more spectacular than it had ever been before_

_He could see the night sky all around him, the stars were **beautifull**...._

_And what was even more amazing- more so than the sheer and utter beauty of it all- was that Derek felt... **good**_

_Hell he felt incredible!!_

_He felt light and free and blissfully floaty, and nothing hurt.... nothing hurt and he felt amazing_

_He found himself suddenly standing in the preserve, fireflies were lit up everywhere, creating almost as much brightness as the stars and the moon... the beautifull full moon..._

_The world around him was so soft and beautifull, the air was warm but carried with it a gentle breeze, and the air was so much cleaner and clearer than he could ever remember it being before_

_He loved it here_

_He loved feeling this way, he loved experiencing these things, he loved the beauty, he loved it all_

_He laid back in the grass, staring up at the beautifull sky and letting a smile cross over his face_

_A real, true smile, for the first time in so, so many years..._

_He heard a quiet crunch of leaves from behind him, turning his head and watching the bushes rustle, a feeling of tentative hopefullness washing over him_

_"Mom...?"_

 

~+~

 

"Ok, get the cooling blanket off of him, we need to replace it with the warming blanket," Kira said quickly, immediately running towards the werewolf laying on the table

"Wait a second, it hasn't been a full minute yet, it hasn't even been a few SECONDS yet," Scott frowned, hesitation in his form as he slowly walked towards the other doctor

Kira paused, a look of confusion on her face as she turned back to look at Scott

"Right... you... you aren't actually suggesting we go along with his crazy plan are you? To let him stay dead for an entire minute?"

Scott looked down, a bit ashamed for his assumption

"Kira.... he's ... he's determined about this, if he went this far don't you think he'll just do it again once he finds out that we didn't follow his .. rules?"

"He doesn't have to find out," Kira argued

"We'll tell him he was out the entire minute, that it didn't work, whatever we have to,"

"Kira... not that I don't like your plan but .... let's be honest, neither of us are the best liars, I sort of just proved that, he'll find out, and when he does.... who knows what he'll do?"

There was a tense of air silence between them for a moment before Kira threw the cooling blanket off of Derek's body, hurrying to grab the warming one instead and drape it over him

"I don't care, we'll cross that bridge when we come to it, I'm bringing him back- **_now_** ,"

 

~+~

 

Derek felt almost dizzy, but it was a good kind of dizzy

A weird, weightless, wonderfull dizziness that made him feel lighter than air

He lifted off of the ground, barely even feeling the shift in position as he started walking towards the bushes

He didn't know why but... he thought maybe his mother was the one lurking behind them

He had an odd sort of intuitive thing going on, or atleast he felt like he did

Maybe, he hoped, just... maybe......

 

~+~

 

"It isn't working... why isn't it working!?"

"I don't... I don't know, I don't know!"

Everything was a disaster, and reasonably, Scott knew he shouldn't have expected anything less

They were dealing with _death_ for crying out loud!

But somehow... somehow he just hadn't expected things to go this WRONG....

A full minute had passed since the first second that Derek flatlined and he was still gone

Kira was doing CPR and Scott was trying to remember how long to wait between doses of epinephren and...

And it was occuring to him that they couldn't do this

Whatever that meant for their medical careers in the longrun, they couldn't do **this** right now, and he had to contact someone who could

He dropped what he was doing, grabbing his cell phone from his pocket and shakily typing out the message

"What are you doing!?" Kira shouted anxiously

"Getting help!"

He just hoped that this help would be enough

 

~+~

 

"Thanks again for the coffee Allison, I appreciate it,"

God did he ever appreciate it

The hospital coffee sucked, no doubt about it, but on nights like these he needed the caffiene no matter how bad it tasted

He was just glad his shift was over though, it had been a tough night and he desperately wanted to go home and breathe, have some hot food and lay out in front of the TV like a slug....

Unfortunately, it didn't seem like luck was going to be on his side with that

He no more got the coffee cup raised to his lips before he heard his emergency pager go off, the pager that only a very select number of people had the number for...

He cursed, setting his cup down and picking up his pager

_Emergency in the basement! Hurry!!!! -Scott_

"Stiles? Is something wrong?" Allison asked, not that he really heard her, he was too busy panicking

His heart utterly sank at the words on the screen, anxiety rushing through him as he started running down the hall, racing towards the elevator and barely acknowledging that Allison was shouting after him

He slammed his fingers down on the elevator button over and over again, panic rising higher and higher in his blood

Scott had never texted him about an emergency before and he could only imagine what it could be, and why whatever it was was in the freaking basement

It had to be something supernatural right?

If it was something human why wouldn't they just be in the hospital?

Unless.... unless whatever it was could only be healed by magic

"COME ON!!" he screamed urgently, gritting his teeth as he stared up at the numbers above the elevator, waiting desperately for the third floor number to light up and feeling his heart clench when it finally did, the door opening and Stiles rushing in, only to stumble when he found he wasn't alone

"Lydia?"

"Let me guess, Scott?" the resident asked with an unamused frown as Stiles hurried to slam the button down for the basement level floor

"Yeah how'd you know...?"

"I was with them,"

"In the basement!?" he shouted as the door shut

"Shhh!! Not so loud!" Lydia chastised, her face becoming more and more irritated as time went on

"Yes, in the basement," she finally said, her voice quieter, somewhat hushed as she leaned against the back wall of the elevator

"What the hell is going on down there?"

"Honestly? You wouldn't believe me if I told you,"

"Don't be so sure," Stiles frowned back, biting his lip as he waited anxiously for the elevator to get to the basement

"It's a long story, just take my word that it's a complete and utter wreck, I hope you didn't overextend your magic today,"

"Aw hell..." he grumbled

He didn't know what they would need his magic for, but he was afraid to ask...

The moment the elevator door opened he sprinted out, rushing towards the light at the end of the hall and not paying any mind to where Lydia was behind him

He slammed into the room, his heart racing as he looked around at the chaos unfolding around him

Kira and Scott were near tears, rushing around screaming commands back and forth and there was a guy laying on the MRI table flatlined with a heating blanket on....

Lydia was right, this was a wreck

"What the hell is going on in here?"

Scott was the first to jerk his head up, looking about as panic stricken as Stiles felt

"He won't... he won't come back... he won't... what.. what... what are we doing wrong!?"

The paramedic swallowed, taking a few steps closer and exhaling lowly

"Well, you have to turn the warming blanket on for one thing,"

 

~+~

 

_He felt like the woods were continuing on forever_

_There didn't seem to be an end in sight, but that was ok_

_Things here were so peacefull and beautifull that he wouldn't mind if they never ended, he wouldn't mind if they just went on for eternity, if he stayed here forever_

_He finally found himself brushing past the last of the trees and arriving at a clearing where everything just seemed.... perfect....._

_The bushes were rustling again, but Derek didn't step any closer, instead he waited, watching as a familiar black paw stepped out from the weeds_

_**"Derek?"** _

_"Mom?" he repeated again, watching another paw come forward_

_**"Derek...? You need to wake up now Derek, come on... it's time to wake up,"** _

_"No... no I don't want to!" he shouted desperately, taking a hurried, stumbling step closer, but before he could reach out, before he could get any further, before he could see if it was really his mother or not-_

_**"DEREK!!!"** _

Derek gasped, jerking awake and blinking the stiffness from his eyes

His heart was pounding, he didn't even have to hear the heart monitor going to know that

He blinked again, staring up at the face of the man staring down at him

He looked... panicked... and he _definitely_ wasn't one of the doctors that Derek had invited down here for this

"Derek? Can you hear me?" he asked quietly, fright and desperation shimmering in his big, brown doe eyes, soft lips pressed into a thin, worried line

"Y-Yeah," he mumbled quietly, locking eyes with the stranger above him

"Yeah I hear you,"

"Good," the stranger nodded slowly, licking his lips

"That's good... because you're a FREAKING. IDIOT!!" the stranger shouted, giving Derek something of a shock as he stared up at him

He didn't get a chance to question it, however, as the sound of a door skidding open pulled their attention away from eachother and towards the disruption

Standing in the doorway was a somewhat disshevled looking doctor with long, curly brown hair

"What the HELL is going on in here!?" she shouted

"Oh... hi Allison," the man on top of Derek said slowly, glancing down at the wolf before turning back to the human woman

"It isn't what it looks like- I SWEAR,"

 

~+~

 

" _Ahhhhh_ ,"

"Well, unbelievable as this is, everything seems to check out..." Stiles said quietly, removing the tongue depressor from Derek's mouth and tossing it in the bathroom trash can behind him

"You're fine," Scott agreed a second later, removing the stethoscope from the other wolf's chest and the ear plugs from his ears

"I told you I would be," Derek said with a small shrug, reaching for his shirt and starting to slip it over his head again

"Yeah but... you _died_ , can you really blame us for being worried?"

"If I blamed you I wouldn't have invited you in the first place," Derek noted with a shrug

"Ofcourse... you didn't invite ME, but you're the luckiest S.O.B. on the face of the earth that Scott decided to," Stiles noted with a deep frown

To say he still didn't approve of this crazy plan was putting it VERY mildly

"Yeah, I guess I am," Derek replied softly, hopping off of the bathroom counter and taking a step closer to the paramedic

"I'm lucky you were at the hospital, I'm lucky you happened to be Scott's freind, I'm lucky he called you, I'm lucky you remembered to turn on the warming blanket..."

Scott, in the background, ducked his head and started to fidget, clearly not proud of the ... incident

"I'm lucky," Derek concluded a moment later

Stiles sucked his teeth, nodding slowly and crossing his arms over his chest

"Yeah.... yeah, you're lucky," he muttered back

_"Guys!! You have to see this!!"_

The boys all turned their attention towards the center of the apartment, filing out and gathering around the coffee table where the laptop currently was, Kira, Allison, and Lydia all staring at it as if it held the secrets of the universe

And, in a way, it sort of did

Atleast to a point

"Look, do you see this? This is after he flatlined," Lydia explained, repositioning the laptop so that the boys could have a better veiw

"What am I looking for here?" Stiles frowned, tilting his head as he stared down at the screen

There were some flickering lights, some colors flashing here and there, and then-

"There!" Lydia beamed, pointing to a bright streak of white that flickered in a dark area of the scans

"He shouldn't be having activity there, not after flatlining especially, but he _is_ , he keeps having it the entire time he's out,"

"So ... so what, we can prove that the brain stays active for atleast a minute after death?" Stiles asked

"It's a little more complicated than that and there's still nothing conclusive that we can draw from this but... but this is huge... this is a huge advancement in the right direction... Derek, what was it like?" she asked breathlessly, staring up at the werewolf in complete and utter awe

Derek swallowed, shifting his weight and trying to ignore all of the eyes suddenly glued to him

He had never been good with attention and now was certainly no exception to that general rule...

"It was.... weird, weird and amazing... I .. felt like I was floating, like I was flying for a wile, I felt weightless... I could see everything, it felt like, I walked into the woods, and... everything was peacefull, it was soft, warm, smelled amazing.... it was like..."

"Like paradise?" Stiles suggested

Derek glanced towards him, giving a slow nod

"Amazing," Lydia breathed, grinning from ear to ear

"So... all of that, everything... it could have just been a hallucination?" Derek asked quietly, crossing his arms over his chest

"A .. dream, an illusion, whatever you want to call it?"

"As opposed to what?" Lydia asked with a slight frown

"Don't you believe in an afterlife?"

"Do you?"

"You're a banshee, don't you pretty much HAVE to believe in an afterlife?" Stiles frowned in confusion

"Honestly? I'm not sure what I believe in, my powers may be from the afterlife, or from some... extra sensory portion of my brain, they could be visions just as easily as hallucinations, we can't be sure, but that's part of why we're doing this experiment isn't it? To see what we can scientifically prove?"

Derek.... didn't seem at all pleased with that

"Right," he said quietly, swallowing and stepping back

"Right, ofcourse,"

"Allison, be a doll and make us some coffee ok? This is going to be a long night," the banshee said with an excited smile

"I think we need pizza too, are there any pizza places open at two in the morning?" Kira asked

"I think there might be one.." Scott muttered back, grabbing his phone to look it up

Stiles glanced to his side, wondering if Derek really wanted all of this activity in his apartment- sure he had invited them all back, but under the umbrella of making sure he didn't have any complications, not.. having a party....- when he noticed that the other wolf wasn't even there

Glancing around, he took note of the open window a few feet away and slipped out of the limelight himself, stepping out of the window and onto the balcony where Derek was already sitting, staring up listlessly at the night sky

"Hey," Stiles greeted quietly, staring down at the wolf- he didn't look up in return

"Hey,"

"Can I sit?"

Derek gave a wordless nod, so Stiles sat down next to him, curling his arms around his legs and glancing at the wolf

"So... I know we haven't exactly known eachother for very long, but I still think I should tell you exactly how STUPID that was, it was seriously one of the stupidest things I've ever even heard of, you know that right? I mean you do realize exactly how crazy and rediculous your plan was right?"

"I'm aware," Derek replied casually, not even bothering to look over at him- still

"Well, just so you're aware," Stiles snorted, leaning back a little and turning his attention back to the sky

"I know it isn't my place but... I take it by your reaction to Lydia's little 'scientific discovery' party that you weren't really hoping for the results that you ended up getting,"

"You're right, it isn't your place," Derek replied simply

Stiles shrugged, glancing at the wolf out of the corner of his eye

"Did you see what you wanted to see?"

Derek was quiet for a few moments, still not giving Stiles his attention but curling in a little bit tighter on himself

"I... don't know, I'm not really sure what I wanted to see, if I'm being honest I'm not really sure what I ended up seeing either,"

"I get that, it's like looking at an abstract painting right? One minute you think it's a bowl of fruit, the next you're sure that it's two dudes having sex,"

Derek finally looked over at him, a deepset frown on his face- though it wasn't angry

It wasn't exactly amused but it wasn't angry either

"No, that's not what it's like at all,"

"Eh... maybe not for you, maybe it will be for me though, I'm going next,"

If he thought the fruit bowl comment had gotten Derek's attention, he _really_ had the wolf's eyes on him now

"What do you MEAN 'you're going next'?"

"I mean I'm going to flatline tommorrow night,"

"Didn't you JUST say that flatlining is the stupidest thing ever?"

"I said 'one of', firstly, and secondly, nobody ever said I was smart,"

"Scott did,"

"Well that's his problem,"

Derek tightened his jaw, eyes narrowed in irritation

"Stiles... it isn't a rollercoaster to ride or a drug to get high on, it's _death_ ,"

"Yeah, I'm aware of that, considering that I'm the one who brought you BACK from death,"

"Then why-"

"You went looking for something when you died," Stiles said quickly, cutting him off

"I need to look for something too,"

There was a long, long stretch of silence between them, before Derek finally sighed and hung his head

"For the record, I don't like this,"

"Yeah, well... that makes two of us,"

 

~+~

 

Stiles had already worked out where to meet the other members of The Flatliners Club- and he was calling it that no matter how many times Derek told him not to- before they parted for the night, so when the next night came around there was no worrying about figuring out logistics

It was.... kind of a weird feeling, knowing that he was about to _die_ later that night

It had him going through the day in a fog, and he spent the entire time unsure if he was excited or anxious, not sure if he wanted it to get here sooner so he could experience it or if he wanted it to get here sooner so he could just get it over with

Stiles was someone who was terrified of even getting check-ups, and yet... somehow the thought of death wasn't nearly as terrifying

He was somehow much more concerned with hoping that they wouldn't put an IV in his arm, with his needle phobia it was enough that he was going to have to have the propothal injection- given his pain tolerance wasn't NEARLY as high as Derek's- and that he knew in the back of his mind that they'd be using epiniphrine to help bring him back but...

His mind was absolutely CONSUMED all day, and it was sort of a wonder that he had made it through work

But now the time had arrived, he was standing outside of the pub they were supposed to meet at, staring up at the sign with anxiety coursing through his veins like a drug

He just ... he just had to do this, he had to push himself so he could answer his own questions...

So he pushed through the door, swallowing tightly and making his way towards the table in the back where the doctors were all waiting, and ... looking rather stupdified...

"Hey, what're we all looking at?" he asked curiously

"Just the living dead over there," Lydia replied casually, nodding past Stiles and prompting the witch to turn, noting with surprise that .. Derek was playing the piano in the pub...

Huh, he hadn't pegged him for someone with that kind of confidence...

"Soooo he's a good pianist, good for him....?"

"Usually your indifference would be justified, but according to Derek he hasn't touched a piano in _over a decade_ ,"

Stiles had never played an instrument, but even he knew that was something to be impressed by

"And I take it that playing piano isn't exactly like riding a bike..."

"Not at the level he's playing,"

"That isn't all, he was on FIRE at work today," Kira added

"He was figuring things out before the rest of us even had time to THINK about them, he even got one before Lydia did," Scott added, clearly impressed- he hadn't peeled his eyes off of the guy since Stiles walked in, that was definitely Scott's impressed face

"You're kidding me, _nobody_ beats Lydia,"

"Yeah.... until today," Scott agreed with a smirk

Stiles swallowed heavily, his gaze narrowed in on the older man as his fingers gracefully danced against the piano keys

Well, atleast he could find comfort in the fact that if something went wrong, Derek had a weird mental boost high enough that he should be able to bring him back....

He hoped....

 

~+~

 

"You're absolutely sure about this?"

"Scott, buddy, I'll be fine, Derek did it, he was fine,"

"He almost wasn't, he only was because of you," Scott argued with a deep frown

"And I'll be fine now because of him, see how that works? It's give and take, basic Kindergarden 101 here,"

Scott still seemed more than a little hesitant, wich was exactly why Lydia stepped up towards him, gently taking the needle out of his hand and giving him the silent encouragement to just step out of the way

"Mm you're sure that's just going to put me to sleep temporarily right? I know how much I can get on your nerves," Stiles teased as he started to shiver, the cooling blanket was really starting to do it's job now and now he could feel his body temperature starting to drop lower and lower, his mind getting foggy, thoughts getting slow

It was time

"Just relax, you'll wake up in just a minute, seriously," she assured him as she pushed the plunger down on the needle

The last thing he saw as his eyes started to close probably should have been Lydia, since she was the one talking to him and trying to reassure him and all, but... it wasn't

It was Derek, and somehow.... Stiles kind of felt better about that

 

~+~

 

_He could remember everything_

_His memories were flashing in front of him and somehow he could **feel** them_

_All of the joy, all of the peace, all of the innocence that he used to feel, that he had felt as a child..._

_He could feel it all again and it was amazing_

_Riding his bike for the first time, trick-or-treating and getting extra peices of candy- the good kind, like Kitkats and Mr. Good Bars, not the crappy kind like Sweet Tarts and Twizzlers- baking cookies with his mom, opening presents on Christmas morning with his mom wile his dad filmed it on the video camera, cutting into his Yu-Gi-Oh birthday cake with his mom..._

_His mom...._

_He suddenly felt like he was seven-years-old again_

_He didn't look it, when he looked down and saw himself in the rain puddles on the sidewalk, he still LOOKED like he was in his twenties, but..._

_"Mom?" he called quietly, staring down the road as he watched the memories play out in front of him_

_He could see himself as a seven-year-old hopping in the puddles, his raincoat dripping from the pouring showers, smiling up at his mother..._

_His mother looked so happy, it was right before things went wrong_

_Right before things got bad...._

_"Mom?" he called out a little louder_

_The woman paused, turning around slowly, but... but he couldn't see her face...._

_Why couldn't he see her face..!?_

_"Mom!" he shouted, taking another step, hoping that he would somehow be able to see her if he got close enough, but just as he reached out to touch-_

"Stiles!!"

The paramedic gasped loudly, practically tossing his head back as he blinked back into awareness

Everyone was standing around him, over him, peering down at him, it was actually pretty unnerving...

"Soooo.... was that it?"

Somehow, only Derek seemed amused by that

 

~+~

 

"It's the weirdest thing... I've never felt this kind of buzz before, I mean magic has always had it's own kind of buzz to it but this is... this is ...."

"More intense?" Derek guessed, slipping his hands in his pockets as the group exited the pub

"Yeah... yeah, more intense," Stiles huffed back quietly, grinning like he was on some kind of high as he started walking a little bit faster

It felt like his heart was pounding, and not in the dangerous, concerning kind of way, but in the amazing, fun, exciting kind of way, and he hadn't felt like that in....

Hell, had he EVER felt like that?

"This is amazing, I feel like I could do anything, like... like nothing is off limits, like there's just all of this energy just... just WAITING to be used,"

"So why don't you try it?" Lydia suggested suddenly

Stiles paused, tilting his head curiously at her as they walked down the sidewalk

"What do you mean?"

"Well.... you feel like you can do anything right? So why not try anything? Do something with the energy you feel, try something you've never been able to do before,"

"I don't know if that's the best idea, what if he.... overdoes it or something?" Scott noted worriedly from behind him

But Stiles barely even heard him, Lydia's words playing over and over again in his head like a record on repeat, and all he could do, he decided, was to do what she said

Lydia was usually right about practically everything, why would she be wrong here?

So he ran out a few more yards, until they were officially standing in front of his apartment building, pulled his hands out of his jacket pockets and took a deep breath

He stared up at the sky, feeling the energy practically pooled at his fingertips as he brought his hands up to his mouth and blew into them, watching as a tiny but steady stream of snowflakes drizzled out and floated up between his fingertips and into the sky

"What is he doing?" he could hear Kira ask from behind him

The general consensus seemed to be "I don't know", and if he was being COMPLETELY honest...

Stiles wasn't really that sure if he knew either

Atleast, not until he watched with excitement and disbeleif as snowflakes slowly started to fall from the grey clouds up above them

They fell

And then they streamed

And then they _poured_

"Oh my God...." Derek breathed quietly, staring up at the sky in nothing short of amazement

"Snow ... in November.... in California..." Scott said quietly

A bright, enormous smile broke out over Stiles' face as he ran back towards the group, grabbing Derek's hand and dragging him out into the street

"What are we doing?" the werewolf asked a little hesitantly

"Dancing! You and me Big Guy, we're gonna dance!"

"With no music?" Derek asked with an amused smirk

And if that was really the biggest problem Derek had with this....

Stiles grinned, running over to one of the cars parked (probably illegally) by the sidewalk, tapping a few times on the hood and watching in delight as the radio lit up and music started to play

"What's your excuse now?" he asked with a bright laugh

"I guess I don't have one,"

And then, just like that, like nothing, like everything was different and better and brighter, Stiles was dancing in the middle of the street in the snow with Derek

And it was amazing

"He made it snow..." Allison said quietly

"Is that... is that especially special or something?" Kira asked curiously

"Witches can't just... change the weather on a wim, only extremely old, very powerfull witches can bring a change of weather- well, a major change- especially something as delicate as snow.... and in an environment that doesn't usually allow for it at all? That's... it's _incredible_ ," Lydia explained almost breathlessly

"So Derek has piano and Stiles has snow," Scott concluded simply

"I'm going next,"

The banshee glanced up at the werewolf, a deep frown on her face as she stared at him

"Scott-"

"No I... I NEED to go next, ok? I'm drowning here ... I can't keep up with all of this, I can't remember anything, I never have the right answers... if flatlining made them so much more powerfull ... maybe it'll help me stay on top of my residency,"

"He has a point.... and it'd be more results to study," Allison offered with a slight shrug

Lydia was quiet for a few moments, clearly not very happy with the proposition

"I still think it's incredibly stupid," Lydia noted with a quiet sigh, but she was past trying to talk them out of it

This had developed into a thing weather she liked it or not and they were clearly going to do whatever the hell they wanted to do completely regardless of her opinion on the matter

"I know," Scott settled with a slight smile

He knew it was stupid, but to him it was worth it

Just like it was worth it to Stiles and Derek, chasing whatever it was they were chasing

He had a feeling it wasn't science, but it was really none of his business at this point

"Look at them.... they're so in sync," Kira said with a soft, dreamy sigh

The wolf turned his attention back to the pair dancing in the street, the carefree smile on Derek's face that he had never seen before, the sheer innocent excitement that he hadn't seen Stiles wear in years...

If flatlining could do that to them, what could it possibly do for him?

"They should bottle this stuff," Allison snorted teasingly

"No kidding," Kira laughed, a rupture of butterflies fluttering in her stomach as she felt Scott wrap his hand around her's, both of them watching as the witch and the wolf in the street paused suddenly in their movement, only for Stiles to lean up and excitedly, but gently, press his lips to Derek's

Scott squeezed her hand

She squeezed back

This was good

She only hoped it could last

 

~+~

 

"Does it feel like we're doing this a little too fast?"

Derek glanced up, eyebrows raised lazily as he shifted onto his side and propped his head up with his hand

"Well.... if you think this is going too fast you may have wanted to tell me _before_ I let you do things to my body,"

"Not US," Stiles snorted, although, to be fair, yeah, having only really known eachother for a rough estimate of two days and already being in bed together was probably a little fast but that really wasn't his point

"I meant flatlining, two people in two days, Scott wants to go tommorrow, doesn't it feel like... like we're just going really fast and yet haven't really studied anything about it? Ok, yeah, you and I are fine NOW but how will we be in three weeks? Or five years? Or FIFTY years? What if it has lasting effects?"

"Funny how none of this came up when YOU wanted to flatline but now that it's your best freind it's all bubbling to the surface,"

Stiles shrugged, sucking on his teeth as he moved to drape his body over Derek's drawing aimless patterns in the wolf's skin

"I'm biased, and selfish, I can admit to that, but you have to agree it's a legitimate concern,"

Derek did agree, actually

Hell he had thought it was too much too soon when Stiles wanted to do it but when Scott said he was going next...

"I agree," he finally relented, laying back a little bit more on the pillows and letting a hand rest on Stiles' back

"I agree.... but we can't do anything about Scott, he already.... reserved his spot, I guess you could say, it wouldn't be fair to challenge that, but.... no more, especially for a wile,"

Stiles nodded slowly, letting his head rest gently on Derek's chest and closing his eyes

"Ok," he said softly, allowing his eyes to close as he felt sleep beginning to creep over him

"Ok... I can accept that..."

 

~+~

 

"You're sure about this Scotty? You know we can always stop now if you want,"

"Stiles... I'm doing this,"

He wished he wouldn't

Stiles didn't care about his own life- he never had- but Scott's?

Scott's he cared about explicitly and constantly and DEEPLY and knowing that he was going to stop his heart was driving Stiles crazy, even if he did feel confident that he could bring the wolf back

"I'll be fine, you both were," he added, staring pointedly up at Stiles and Derek

And... ok, he had a point

"Alright.... alright, you ready then?"

"Yeah, just... one quick thing, I want to stay under for two minutes,"

"No," Stiles insisted sharply

"No, absolutely not, we're not extending the time, one minute is bad enough-"

"I'm a werewolf, I'll heal!"

"It isn't just about that! Look, we still don't know what the effects of flatlining are exactly ok? We don't know what's going to happen down the line, if this is more dangerous than we think it is now, and we're not extending an unnecessary risk-"

"It isn't unnecessary, I NEED this boost, you both went under as an experiment, just to see what would happen, but you didn't NEED the side effects, I do! I need to be able to get through this residency, to... do everything I need to do and know everything I need to know to become a doctor and I can't do that at the level I'm at now, I NEED more.... please Stiles...... please?"

As much as Stiles wanted to argue- and he so, **_so_** wanted to argue- he knew that Scott had a point, and if there was one thing Stiles never wanted to be, it was a hypocrit

"Alright, alright just... just don't say I never did you any favors ok?"

Scott smiled brightly, nodding as if he was being promised a trip to Disneyland, not literally about to die

It kind of made something in Stiles' head scream, alarm bells going off, shouting that this was getting too casual, too easy

Death shouldn't be this casual

Death shouldn't be so easy

But because of flatlining, it had become that way...

He was just glad that Scott was going to be the last one doing this, atleast for a wile...

(He hoped that Scott would be the last one to do it at all, and he was atleast relieved that the girls didn't seem overly keen on the idea of flat-lining, but.... you could never know for sure)

"Stiles? You ok?"

The witch blinked up at Scott as he reached up and gently squeezed Stiles' shoulder, a look of concern on his face

"I'm fine,"

"Fine", ofcourse, was a relative term

"I know it.... it'll be hard to watch but-"

"I'm fine," Stiles insisted again, gently grabbing Scott's hand and leading him into the room where everyone else was waiting

"Two minutes? Really?" Derek said immediately

Ahh werewolf hearing... an eavesdropper's dream

"You can't tell me not to do it," Scott insisted with a frown, clearly already determined no matter what Derek was going to say

"I wasn't going to, I was just going to say good luck," he confirmed with a tense smile

Scott smiled back sincerely, peeling off his lab coat and shirt with ease and climbing onto the cot, letting Allison start to lay out the equipment needed- heart monitor patches on his chest, brain monitor on his head, prepping the propothal....

"Hey, when he goes under... can I talk to you outside for a second?" Stiles wispered, glancing up at Derek as the werewolf finished setting up the laptop

He glanced down at Stiles curiously, eyebrows raising in surprise

"Um... sure?"

Stiles just nodded, inhaling and watching tensely as Scott's eyes fell shut, finding himself flinching when he watched the needle go in

"Hey.... it's going to be ok," Derek promised, squeezing Stiles' shoulder

He must have heard the way Stiles' heart was pounding, smelled the anxiety laced deep in Stiles' scent

"I know," he said quietly, flinching a second time when he watched the paddles press down on Scott's chest, the sound of the flatline ringing like an alarm through the room, but before he could relieve himself of the situation, an ear-peircing, blood chilling scream shot through the room, causing the witch to stumble as he hurried to cover his ears with a wince

"Was that necessary?" he hissed, his gaze flickering towards Lydia as the banshee inhaled and started walking towards the laptop

"Yeah, I'm a banshee remember? We scream when people die, even if it's just a temporary death, I did with you too, and Derek, not that anyone heard me out in the parkinglot but..."

Yeah, Stiles still couldn't believe she had actually left back then but he supposed she was just trying to discourage Derek from going under...

"What did you want to talk to me about?" Derek asked suddenly, drawing his attention back to the present moment

The witch gave something of a half shrug, taking his hand and gently dragging him out into the hall

"Are you going to tell me what's going on?" Derek asked with concern

"It's not a big deal, I guess, I just... I feel like maybe we're getting too comfortable with this, you know?"

"Flatlining?"

"Death,"

Derek nodded, crossing his arms over his chest and glancing down

"I mean aren't you at all bothered by the fact that Scott is taking this further? And just so he can remember more stuff!!"

"Well it's a little more complicated than that but... yes, Stiles, it bothers me, it bothered me when you did it too, but I have no right to judge-"

"I'm not suggesting you judge ok? Yeah judging would be... not... good, but... I don't know, maybe we should start taking more precautions of some kind? Make it feel like we're actually DIEING again and not just having a trip, we need to slow down, really badly,"

"I don't know what else we can do, but I'm all for slowing down, we'll take a step back after tonight, not bring it up again until someone else does and when they do... maybe try to dissuade them?"

Stiles nodded slowly, licking his lips and looking down at the floor

"Yeah... yeah, ok, that works," he agreed quietly

Derek gave a tense smile, squeezing his shoulder again before glancing back at the door

"Ready to go bring your freind back to life?"

"Yeah," Stiles snorted, "And hopefully that's the last time I'll ever have to hear THAT,"

 

~+~

 

_The streets were quiet at this time of night, so quiet and empty that they were completely alone_

_Just Scott and Kira on his motercycle, the roar of the engine in the air and a soft breeze pushing against his leather jacket_

_Kira tightened her arms around his waist, smiling as she watched the streetlights pass by_

_He loved the feeling of her bodyheat behind him, his hands tightening on the handlebars as he rode_

_Everything was so peacefull here, so quiet and free, and there wasn't a care in the world, nothing to worry about, nothing to think about, just him and Kira and the open road_

_And then, all of a sudden, for seemingly no reason, Kira was gone_

_The sudden lack of sensation had shock and dread creeping into him, turning to look over his shoulder and finding that, indeed, she was gone_

_And he was alone_

_He looked back to the road, knowing he would crash if he didn't, and suddenly the emptiness didn't feel peacefull or free or happy..._

_It was eerie_

_Creepy_

_Haunting...._

_He swallowed tightly, his heart beating a bit faster as he drove, glancing over his shoulder again, trying at this point to figure out where he was_

_He recognized the streets, sort of, but he couldn't really place them...._

_When he turned his attention back out to the open road in front of him, he found with a shock of fright that it wasn't so empty anymore_

_There was a net sitting just ahead of him, like a soccer net or... or a lacrosse net...._

_And suddenly, in a flash, there was someone standing in front of him_

_A teenage boy with blonde hair and a lacrosse stick, his blue eyes boring holes into the wolf as Scott drove forward_

_He tried to stop, he tried to put the brakes on, but they weren't working... nothing was working!_

_He was going to hit the kid, he was about to crash and just as he took his hands off of the bars to sheild his face-_

"Scott!!"

Scott gasped, eyes flying open as he blinked and tried desperately to adjust to the lights and the sounds and everything else around him

"Scott? You ok?"

He glanced over to Stiles, swallowing and nodding slowly

So the ... dream? Vision? The... whatever it was... had gotten a little scary there at the end, no big deal

Nobody needed to know.... right?

 

~+~

 

Life was good without flatlining

Derek had almost forgotten what it was like to go a night without having anything to do with it, but two days had gone by with no plans to return to the hospital basement and it was kind of incredible

Even before they had actually started the experiments, he had spent so much time researching all of it that he couldn't remember the last time he had gone a night without having anything to do with death going on

And he still thought about it, don't get him wrong

Something about the findings- the fact that even after Scott's record of two minutes they still had the strange brain activity going on- bothered him

He had been hoping for better results, in honesty, but he was atleast satisfied to know that death was actually.... nice

Peacefull

It wasn't a painfull, horrible event like he had worried it was

People who died found peace

"So.... go again?"

Slowly, Derek glanced up from where he was hugging his pillow, staring at Stiles' red-blotched, happy face and feeling a ghost of a smile fall over his face

"Uh-huh," he hummed softly

"Cool, this time I top,"

Derek glanced up at the nightstand, reaching out and grabbing the empty bottle of lube, eyebrows raised

"Oh.... do you have more?" Stiles asked hopefully

"Under the bathroom sink,"

"Under the- ... dude... what is WRONG with you? Why would you keep- ... nevermind, ok, you mentally prepare yourself, I'll be back in a minute, do you need some water or anything? I don't want you to get dehydrated," the witch noted, slipping off of the bed with a quiet hiss as he stretched his legs

"Water might be nice," Derek agreed with a considered nod

"You got it," Stiles winked, giving him a terrible "double finger-guns" ... thing... before heading out of the bedroom and into the main area of the apartment

Derek shook his head, eyes rolling as he turned over on his stomach and closed his eyes, snuggling his face deeper into the pillow and inhaling deeply

It smelled like Stiles, it was comforting and soothing and _good_

He could probably fall asleep like this, and although he hoped he would stay awake long enough to sample his partner's advanced stamina (again), he wasn't going to make any specific efforts to stay awake

It was too cozy here, too good...

If only it could stay that way forever

_"Derek?"_

The wolf's eyes snapped open, his heart suddenly pounding in his chest like a drum as he glanced around, anxiety rushing in his veins

That voice....

That voice had been in his nightmares for years now...

Why was it back?

Why was it _here_!?

His eyes centered on the closet across from him, noticing that the door was ajar, and suddenly his stomach sank, his heart speeding up even faster as he stared at the door

 _"Derek..."_ he heard again

The same horrible, devilish voice...

"St-Stiles?" he called out anxiously

The door moved, just barely, just an inch, but on it's own

"Stiles!!" he shouted

It felt like he was glued in place

As much as he wanted to run, as much as he wanted to break away and get out of this place...

He was practically cemented in place...

"Derek!? What's wrong!?"

Derek glanced up towards the doorway, a panicked looking Stiles standing there holding the bottle as well as glass of water

He wasn't really sure how to answer

Now that Stiles was back, he didn't know what to say....

What? "I heard a voice when my eyes were closed and the closet moved on it's own"?

Stiles, though, seemed to have noticed the way Derek had been staring at the closet earlier, easily setting the bottle and the glass down on the nightstand and took a slow, stalking step towards the closet

He reached out, swallowing as his hand placed on the door and quickly jerked it open, revealing nothing but clothes inside

Some part of Derek was relieved by the emptiness, but he was also terrified by it

The fact that there was nothing there meant that he was either hallucinating....

Or a very literal ghost from his past was here to haunt him...

"Hey, Derek? What's the matter? What's wrong?" Stiles asked with concern, finally turning back to the older man and moving to sit on the edge of the bed, wrapping an arm around the wolf's shoulders and rubbing gently

He didn't know...

He wouldn't know how to tell him even if he did

 

~+~

 

"Clear!!!"

The paddles sent shocks down into the patient's chest, and after a slightly tense moment, the sound of a pulse echoed from the portable ECG, allowing Stiles to breathe

The weird thing about flatlining was how it almost changed the way he revived people in the feild

Or atleast, it changed the way he felt about it

He felt weirdly existential about it now, everytime he heard the sound of a flatline or watched the paddles press down on someone's chest it took him back to a few nights before with Scott

And it .. almost made his chest hurt, in that weird, phantom pains kind of way

And remembering for what must be the umpteenth time how serious death is, how close he was to it, the fact that he willingly submitted to it himself and helped his freind get there when death was such a cruel demon, striking down so many people for no reason at all...

It felt selfish, all of a sudden

Selfish and solemn and guilt-ridden

He hoped those feelings would go away someday, but he sort of had a feeling that they wouldn't

He didn't know if the effects of death could ever really go away

"Hey, you alive?"

He blinked, turning around and staring at his partner in surprise

"Oh... yeah, yeah.. sorry Malia, I was just... I don't know, sorry,"

Malia frowned, eyes narrowing slightly

"You know, you've been zoning out alot lately, way more than the usual Stiles amount, what's going on with you?"

"Nothing, I just.. haven't been sleeping all that much, I've had some stuff going on at night lately,"

"Let me guess, because of my cousin?"

Yeah.... Malia had smelled _that_ on him the day after his and Derek's first .. er... tryst...

It was partly Derek, yes, but flatlining was responsible for quite a bit of too...

Ofcourse he couldn't actually TELL Malia about that so....

"Um.... basically, yeah," he said with a slow nod

"Well, you might want to tell your boyfreind that Laura is starting to get annoyed with his abscences on pack nights, if he doesn't start coming of his own free will again, she's going to yank him out of the hospital hard enough that _he'll_ need a doctor,"

"Noted,"

Stiles wanted to know why Derek apparently wasn't going to pack nights as much as he should be, but it wasn't his place to ask, no matter how weird he thought it was

"Alright, I think we're ready to move him,"

Stiles nodded slowly, making sure that the stranger was properly strapped down to the back board they were using as they loaded him onto the stretcher, the guy had definitely hurt his back and God only knows if his spine was thrown out or not

But Stiles was plenty willing to bet that it was, thus not wanting to risk making it any worse by letting his head flop around in the wind

"By the way, given your little _zone out_ a few minutes ago, I'm driving, you sit in the back,"

Stiles rolled his eyes, but he didn't argue, as annoying as it was, she had something of a point, he really didn't need to be driving if there was any chance he'd zone out again...

The patient groaned quietly, clearly starting to stir and thus getting Stiles' attention

"Hey there, listen, you're going to be ok alright? You're on your way to the hospital," the paramedic said gently as he started loading the stretcher into the ambulance

"You killed your mother,"

Stiles paused, going completely pale as he stared down at the man on the stretcher

"What... what did you say?"

"Call my mother... please..."

Stiles swallowed tightly, running his tongue against the back of his teeth, heart pounding a little bit faster and praying that Malia couldn't hear it from the driver's seat

He was tired

That was all this was

He was just tired

 

~+~

 

"Kira, can you get me another IV bag?"

"Ofcourse!" Kira chirpped with a bright smile, wasting no time in following through on the request and grabbing a new IV bag from the supply closet

On her way back towards the other doctor, however, she was nearly run into by a nurse running down the hall, causing the kitsune to stumble against the wall, her hand reflexively hitting the light switch as a spark of electricity flowed out of her fingertips

The lights flickered off and on a few times before stabilizing, and Kira felt her heart sink

"Huh, must be a power surge," she heard, feeling her co-worker take the IV bag from her without any concern for the sudden look of dread on Kira's face

This wasn't good...

It was never good to be out of control of electrical powers, but in a hospital where people's lives literally depended on the electricity....

It was unacceptable

She swallowed tightly, excusing herself from the room and making her way down the hall in a rush of her own

She needed to talk to Scott, maybe he'd have some advice

He had been so sharp with everything else lately, impressing all of his superiors since flatlining, maybe he'd be able to give her some advice on controlling her powers...

She lit up the moment she spotted him at the nurse's station, taking in a deep, nervous breath and hurrying to catch up to him before he started on whatever he had next on his schedule

"Scott!" she called quickly, successfully catching his attention and watching the bright, wide grin spread across his face as he called out to her in return

"Kira! Hey!"

"I need to talk to you," she said hurriedly, taking him by the arm and dragging him into one of the empty exam rooms, thankfull that they weren't overly packed on a normal Tuesday afternoon

"Is everything ok...?"

"I want to talk to you about flatlining," she said quietly, watching the look on his face light up even brighter

"It's amazing! I mean, the effects of it are amazing! I've been on fire for the last two days, I... I know the answer to almost every question that comes my way, I'm making conclusions and diagnoses almost on instinct, it's THAT intuitive, it's amazing!!"

"That's great-"

"I'm even more in control of my powers! I've never felt so in touch with my wolf side before! I mean .. I ... I feel so... I don't know, in-tune, or something like that, it's just amazing!"

That was it, that was all she needed to hear to make up her mind

"Sorry um... what were you going to say?"

Kira swallowed, tightening her fists and steeling herself with determination

"I'm going next,"

 

~+~

 

"I like this idea about as much as I like the idea of getting into a pit of vipers,"

"I don't like it either, but we can't just refuse, it'd be hypocritical, not to mention she'd probably just do it without us, let's be honest here, as long as Lydia is around no one really NEEDS either of us,"

As much as Stiles really, really hated to admit it...

He knew that Derek had a point

"So we just go along with it?"

"I guess," he said with a small shrug

There really wasn't anything they could do, especially with how determined Kira seemed to be

Determined people found a way for things, and Derek knew that from his own experience

"Look, it's been five days since we started all of this and nothing terrible has happened so far so... what's there to worry about?"

"You mean besides everything?" Stiles snorted back in irritation

Derek frowned slightly, taking Stiles' hand and giving it a reassuring squeeze

"Everything will be fine, I promise,"

He just hoped he could keep that promise....

 

~+~

 

"You don't think her being a kitsune is going to damage this somehow do you?"

"I hope not,"

"You HOPE not!?"

"Stiles... she'll be sedated, I'm sure her powers aren't going to be that active when she's not even conscious," Lydia assured him gently- albeit it with a bit of frustrated huff

Stiles didn't seem nearly as convinced

"I'll be fine," Kira insisted again as she laid down on the cot

"What I'm more concerned with is where Allison is," Derek mused quietly, crossing his arms over his chest

They had agreed to meet at two in the morning, it would have been earlier but Allison's shift didn't end until one, and now...

Now she wasn't even there....

"I've called her twice already, she's not picking up," Scott said with a deep frown, staring down at his cell phone with an anxious bite of his lip

"Do you think something is wrong?" Stiles asked worriedly

"She might just have crashed, she's been working since yesterday afternoon, she probably went home to change and fell asleep before she could," Kira shrugged as Lydia started placing the patches over her chest

He really couldn't blame her for wanting to do this regardless of a little hang-up like Allison being MIA, he'd been there, he knew what it was like to want almost desperately to go through with it but...

It didn't really help her case if they were down a doctor...

And he WAS legitimately worried about Allison, what the hell could be keeping her?

 

~+~

 

"Mom, can't we do this later?"

Allison had thought that getting her own place and having a job in an emergency room would somehow _lessen_ the amount of control her parents had over her, but apparently not nearly as much as she had hoped...

"We need to do this NOW," her mother argued firmly

"Mom.... I've been working a double shift, I haven't slept in over 24 hours,"

"And yet it looked to me like you were about to go out when I got here,"

"Yeah, to get some chamomile tea so I can sleep," Allison frowned tensely

There was probably no way she'd be getting to the hospital tonight, but if she could atleast get her mother to leave so she could call Lydia and explain what was going on...

"I'll buy the tea FOR you when we're done here, now sit, I want to go over this again, if a werewolf should happen to come to the hospital, how will you identify it?"

Allison's entire body moved with the weight of the sigh that pressed out of her lungs

 

~+~

 

"It's fine, we'll just do it without her, three of the best doctors at the hospital plus the best paramedic I've ever seen are here with me, I'll be fine," Kira insisted with a gentle smile

"Yeah... I know you will," Scott smiled back, leaning down and kissing his girlfreind's forehead before stepping back and allowing Lydia to begin the process

Lydia had always been the calmest and most collected when it came to all of this, wich was no real surprise considering how dedicated she was to the science

They all had their own reasons for wanting to pursue this, but Lydia was probably the only person involved who's reasons were mostly clinical

"Are we ready?"

Scott gave the go-ahead nod, Stiles and Derek were standing tensely in the back, waiting

As if it hadn't been bad enough that Kira wanted to pursue this at all, she wanted to aim for two minutes like Scott did, wich just made Stiles even more nervous

Luckily he had Derek beside him, gently and soothingly rubbing his thumb against Stiles' wrist as the peircing sound of the flatline echoed out through the room

"Oh, that reminds me," the witch mused absently

"Malia told me to tell you your sister wants you at more pack nights, just so you know,"

It was kind of funny, what had started out as an adrenaline-fueled fling had really turned into an actual relationship, or... as much as a relationship could become in a matter of days

But the sex was amazing and Stiles actually cared about Derek and Derek _seemed_ to actually care about Stiles too so it looked like a win/win to him

"Thanks," Derek snorted

"I'll put it on my calander, right between work and reviving my freinds from self-induced flatlines,"

Stiles actually found it kind of cute that Derek- who Scott had always described as a loner- called them his freinds

Not that he was going to say anything about that, Stiles knew when to tease and when not to break the atmosphere

This was a time for the latter

 

~+~

 

_Kira felt like she could see everything from here_

_She felt like she was floating, like she was watching the most brilliant moments of her life flashing before her eyes_

_Her sixth grade choir concert, the day she won third place in the science fair, her acceptance into medical school..._

_It felt amazing_

_It felt amazing and rich and so unexplainably **good** that she almost didn't know what to do with it_

_But that goodness only lasted for so long_

_Electricity started to flicker within her her memories, like lightening flashes shading her vision_

_The flashes started to turn from flickers to huge, blinding gashes, peeling away at her memories and filling her with dread_

_Lightening...._

_Lightening and electricity everywhere, like she was in the center of a massive storm_

_Electrical sparks flew overhead and snapped against the ground, and when she took a step back in some vain attempt to get away from the sparks, she found something waiting behind her_

_She hurried to turn on her heel, heart leaping as she stared at the sword jammed into the ground behind her, electricity sparked against the blade, and she found herself reaching for it against her own will_

_She didn't want it_

_She didn't want any of this_

_But she was reaching for it anyway and right before her fingers wrapped around the handle-_

Kira gasped, her body arching upwards as electricity ruptured throughout the room

Everyone was ducking for cover, covering their heads and ducking behind equipment as electricity shot through the room, bouncing off of the walls like lightening in a jar

The equipment was going crazy and it finally occured to her what was happening, that she was causing this

She hurried to rip the heart monitor patches off of her chest, tearing the wires from her head and tumbling off of the cot, heart racing as the electricity started to calm, turning from wild surges to small, indiscrimminant sparks until it finally dissipated all together

Suddenly the slightly terrifying experience she had had wile dead practically went out of her mind, all she could think about was the terror of the electrical malfunctions that she had caused

"So.... I guess shocking a kistsune isn't as good of an idea as we thought... and by 'we' I mean 'you'," Stiles said slowly, moving from where he had been ducking behind the door and taking a step towards her

Yeah....

Yeah she'd be willing to agree with that....

 

~+~

 

"I'm here!! I'm here!"

The small group of doctors (and one stray paramedic) glanced up from where they were currently sitting on the hospital roof, their attention turned towards Allison as the brunette raced towards them

"You're a tad late," Stiles pointed out

"How did you know where to find us?" Scott asked curiously

"When I didn't see you guys in the basement I asked a couple of people if they had seen you recently, Danny said he saw Derek 'and some other people' going up to the roof,"

"See? I told you he had the hots for you," Stiles noted, gently nudging his boyfreind as Derek glanced up breifly at the witch behind him

"What happened to you earlier? We had to flatline without you," Lydia noted with a small frown, glancing up at Allison worriedly

"My mom.... she came for an impromptu visit and wouldn't let me leave, I tried so hard to get away or ... to call, atleast, but I couldn't get a moment alone until about an hour ago when she finally left, I'm so sorry..."

"It's fine, everything worked out ok, although we won't be flatlining for a wile," Stiles noted with a shrug, secretly rather pleased with that fact

"What? What do you mean? Why not?"

If he didn't know better, he'd say that Allison sounded kind of... panicked.... at that

"Because Kira fried our equipment," he answered simply

"Sorry," the kitsune said with a small frown, ducking her head with guilt

"It's ok, we were really getting too comfortable with all of this anyway, something needed to stop us, just glad that it was the equipment getting damaged and not one of us," Derek said comfortingly, carefully placing his hand on her shoulder as Kira pulled her blanket tighter around her

"No.. no, no, we .. we can't just let this stop us! What about the information we gathered!?"

"The laptop auto-saved everything onto a flashdrive before it got fried, it's fine, I have plenty to look over, and it isn't like we can publish the results without risking losing our liscences anyhow," Lydia shrugged back

"But... but Lydia and I didn't get a chance to do it," she insisted sharply

"I don't want to do it, I'm fine just collecting the results, I told you all I thought you were idiots for toying with death, besides, maybe now my throat will finally heal," the banshee added

"I need to flatline," Allison finally said, done with trying to hedge around what she really wanted to say

"What? But... you've never expressed any interest in it before," Scott frowned slowly

"I know but I NEED to do this, things are different now,"

"What's different? Allison.... what's going on?"

"Does it matter? You all got to experience this... this... life-changing thing! And now the option just isn't there for me?"

"Why does it matter? Why do you want to do this all of a sudden?" Derek frowned

"Maybe I just want to get ahead like Scott did, my mom is ... CONSTANTLY breathing down my neck about my acheivements, or lack thereof, is it so unbelievable that I just want to get her off of my back?"

"No, not unbelievable, but unlikely, why do you want this? It isn't to get ahead, your heartbeat is stuttering," Derek said slowly

"Why does it matter?"

"Because this isn't a game or a way to get high, it's DEATH, Allison, DEATH, you shouldn't be toying with it," Stiles snapped, borrowing the words Derek had told him only days earlier

"Why not? You did! ALL of you did for equally selfish reasons! Kira wanted better control, Scott wanted better acheivements, I'm still not sure exactly WHY you and Derek went under but I'm POSITIVE it wasn't to prove anything to do with science, given the way you both reacted at the results, in fact, I'd be willing to bet you were trying to DISprove them,"

"It doesn't matter now," Derek interrupted, wanting to break all of this apart before it went any further or got any worse

"The equipment is fried, we wouldn't be able to flatline you even if we wanted to,"

"You're all supernatural creatures, one of you controls electricity and another could have gotten a letter to Hogwarts, and you're telling me that there's absolutely no way to fix that equipment?"

"Even if that's true... it's almost five in the morning, the janitor crew is going to be here in an hour," Derek argued

"Well then it's a good thing we don't need an hour, just three minutes,"

"Wah- .... three minutes!? THREE. MINUTES.!?" Stiles shouted

"FIRST you want us to flatline you without any particular reason, THEN you want us to magically revive broken equipment- wich is probably all KINDS of dangerous- and now you want to go under for three minutes- wich is longer than anyone else!?"

"What can I say? I'm a risk-taker,"

"Ok, that is the exact WRONG thing to say-"

"Kira, you want to test your control over your powers right? What better way than to bring the machines back online?"

"She just flatlined a couple of hours ago, isn't that a little soon?" Scott frowned

"Actually I... I feel pretty good," Kira confessed with a slight shrug

"Oh come on, you CAN'T be serious!" Stiles almost shouted, frustration brimming clearly under his skin

"Are you really telling me you're going to go through with this!?"

"I never said that," Kira frowned

"Look, I'm going to flatline weather you guys like it or not, if you don't want to help me, then I'll find someone who will,"

Allison didn't even wait for a response, she turned on her heel and started back towards the stairwell, and everyone else was left in silence as she walked

 

~+~

 

"Just so you know, I don't support this AT ALL,"

"You've made your opinion clear Stiles," Allison said with a small smirk as she set her jacket aside

"And to pull that stupid Derek thing with 'If you don't do it I'll do it myself'! God that gets under my skin..."

Derek, who was reluctantly trying to get the laptop set up again, felt like he should probably be offended by that but decided not to say anything about it

Life was too short, so to speak

"Won't you atleast tell us what this is all about?" Kira asked softly, watching anxiously as the heart monitor started up again

Allison was quiet for a moment, unbuttoning her shirt as she moved to sit down slowly on the cot, eyes glancing down at the floor

"My mother has had control on me for far too long... I just want to make my own life, make my own way, without her influence... she doesn't think I can do this on my own and I want to prove that I can,"

"So it's ... to prove a point?" Stiles asked slowly

"Not ... no, no not just that, there's something else, I can't explain why but ... I think my mom is hiding something from me, I think she's keeping secrets about my family, I want to know what they are, you guys said your intuition and memories improved after flatlining right? Maybe if that can happen for you, it can happen for me too,"

"So you're doing all of this for a boost in memories and intuition?"

"And what did YOU flatline for?"

Stiles sucked on his cheek, nose wrinkling and stepping back, eyes on the floor, as Allison laid down and allowed Kira to attach the necessary monitors to her body

"It should be ready to go now," the kitsune said softly

Allison nodded, smiling gently and giving the thumbs up as Lydia prepared the injection

Stiles was.... he didn't even think "nervous" was the right term anymore, it was more like nauseous

"It'll be ok," Derek promised quietly, wrapping an arm assuringly around his boyfreind's waist

"I hope you're right... this stuff is held up with the magical equivalent of papperclips and clothes pins, it works, but... I can't promise the stability, electricity and magic clash pretty badly so I'm relying mostly on Kira's power to say if it's actually working, you know?"

"I'm sure it'll be fine," Derek repeated, squeezing a little bit harder as the sound of the paddles clicking and the blip on the heart monitor echoed through the room, a flatline blaring out a moment later

"Well.... atleast the equipment didn't blow .. yet...."

 

~+~

__Christmas when she was eight..._ _

__The Christmas tree was alight and glowing, the smell of cookies was filling the house, hot chocolate and candles..._ _

__Her aunt was there, and her grandfather_ _

__Hell her entire family was there, each person seeming to be just as amused by her as the last_ _

__She was happy here_ _

__She was happy at this time in her life, when things were simpler, things were better_ _

__Where had it all gone?_ _

__She remembered her aunt teaching her how to shoot arrows, the way they laughed together at family barbeques every 4th Of July, how her dad would purposefully flip burgers outside the range of everyone's plates just to watch Kate do some kind of **obscenely** stupid stunt to catch them anyway_ _

__She always gave the fly-burgers to Allison because Allison thought they were special_ _

__(She also always drowned them in ketchup despite the constant looks of despair from her father, whatever, Allison liked ketchup, there was no such thing as too much)_ _

__She remembered the bedtime stories, how her aunt Kate would tell her the scariest bedtime stories that she had to offer and always praise Allison over how brave she was_ _

__They talked about slaying monsters together and Kate always marveled at how Allison checked under her bed for monsters on her own instead of asking anyone else to do it_ _

__The memories were good, all up until they weren't_ _

__They went from all of the best things to all of the worst, and Allison found herself standing in the middle of the hospital waiting room just like she had when she was seventeen_ _

__She was seventeen and just getting the news that her aunt was dead_ _

__Her aunt and her grandfather... they were both dead, and her mother claimed it was a car accident_ _

__She could see it playing out all over again in her mind, looking back on it she remembered how even then she had found it hard to believe, but now?_ _

__Now she knew it wasn't true_ _

__She didn't know how she knew, she just... did..._ _

__She forced herself to move forward through the hallways of the hospital, brushing past the memories, watching them move around her like she was staring at movie screens as she walked_ _

__Everything felt oddly surreal around her, like she was moving through water almost, everything was muffled, quieted, foggy, right up until the moment that she came to the hospital room she was looking for_ _

__Her heart was pounding, her vision blurring as she stared up at the room number on the pannel beside the door_ _

__623_ _

__She swallowed tightly, her palms sweating as she set one hand on the doorhandle and pushed down, stepping into the room_ _

__The room was dark, no lights, no sun shining in through the windows, ofcourse it was the middle of the night so there wouldn't be but it was still.... eerily dark..._ _

__She turned her attention towards the bed, staring down at the body covered with the sheets_ _

__Her aunt's body...._ _

__She took a carefull step forward, her hands resting against the edge of the sheet, her heart slamming in her chest as she started to peel it back_ _

_At first, she saw nothing... just.... nothing...._

_So she started pulling a little faster, a little harder, until it was all the way off, and once it was, the horrible, ugly truth laid before her_

_Her aunt's body was burned to a crisp_

_A burnt out husk of what it was, charred and covered in ash and filth_

_Allison felt sick_

_Utterly and completely sick_

_She could feel vomit starting to rise in her throat, her body shaking like a leaf as a scream ripped out of her throat_

_And just when she thought it couldn't get any worse, the body started to... to move.... to twitch in some unholy, unearthly way, the bones cracking and crinkling beneath the burnt flesh, a howled, wailing breath filling her aunt's lungs as the body began to sit up_

_Allison started backing out of the hospital room, fear filling her every inch as she suddenly turned and ran down the hall, she could hear someone- or... someTHING maybe...- following behind her_

_It was getting faster and faster_

_Closer and closer_

_She saw the elevator in sight, it was right there, it was so close...!!!_

_But before she could slide into place-_

Allison sat up with a scream

The sound of the heart monitor beeping and screeching with the speed of her heart was nearly deafening and she could vaguely hear the sound of the people around her shouting, trying to calm her down, feeling their hands on her skin

But she couldn't really hear them, it was all too muffled

She was close to sobbing now, but mostly, she was just shaking

Shaking and distant and deeply regretting her decision to flatline at all

 

~+~

 

The next day, things went back to normal, sort of

Scott was still excelling better than he ever had and Kira seemed to be happier than usual, she assumed it was due to the kitsune finally having a better grasp on her powers

Even Allison herself was doing well, she found that her success was easily matched with Scott's and for the most part things felt normal

But when she closed her eyes....

When she closed her eyes she still felt raw, she could still see that body, smell the burnt flesh, and hear that horrible, horrible sound ...

She knew that the others weren't having this issue, they had all confirmed when she had spoken to them the night before that they had never experienced anything like the nightmare Allison had just been through

Stiles was convinced that it was due to the extra minute under and no one really had any other explanation so that's what they went with for the time being

(Stiles was close to gloating, he probably would have if the situation hadn't been so tense and terrifying for everyone involved)

They had made something of a silent agreement that this was it, the experiment with flatlining was over, and in a way Allison sort of expected things to go back to normal after that

She hoped they would, in some ways, although she enjoyed the new freinds she hated the terror and drama that this had all created

She hoped...

But that hope wasn't going to last for very long

 

~+~

 

"Hey.... babe? I've gotta go to work," Stiles said softly, leaning down to nuzzle softly into Derek's dark hair

The werewolf shifted and huffed quietly, tightening his grip around the witch's waist as a desperate- if somewhat sloppy- attempt to keep him in place

"I appreciate the sentiment but I really do have to go to work," he chuckled, very gently peeling the wolf's hands off of him and kissing each of them affectionately

As much as he wanted to stay- and he so, SO wanted to stay, especially with how dark and rainy and cold the morning was, how much it made him want to stay in bed even if he was alone but... now even more so with Derek- he couldn't skip work

He knew that his schedule wasn't as insane as some in his profession, working both in a hospital as well as in a considerably small town helped with that and his shifts were mostly manageable and not absolutely off the wall like some of the 36-hour nightmares he'd heard of but...

It didn't make it that much easier to handle early mornings all the same

He sighed quietly, leaning down and giving Derek a soft kiss as he started searching for his pants

He really needed to start keeping a change of work clothes at Derek's place with the amount of time he was spending there but for now he'd just have to live with leaving a half hour early and praying that he made it home in time to actually get to work and not be late....

"Hey, what time is your shift starting today?" he asked softly, not wanting to wake Derek too much but still hoping for an answer

"Nine..." Derek mumbled back, curling into the pillow nearest to him

Huh, that wasn't too late he supposed...

"Kay, good to know, we'll try to do lunch ok?"

Derek just nodded, still mostly asleep, but smiled when he felt Stiles press one last kiss to his head

Things felt so... normal.... all of a sudden, for the first time in so, so long...

It was nice, it was... it was _good_

And Stiles hated to leave it, but he looked at it as something of an investment on the future, knowing that this was going to be their lives moving forward, or hoping that it would anyway

This would be their normal and he was good with that

He slipped out of the apartment as discretely as possible, heading down the stairs as he buttoned his shirt and grimacing at the light rain that had started outside

It was times like these he started to wish he kept a pocket umbrella on him...

Oh well, atleast the hot shower he was going to take when he got home would be well deserved

He stepped out of the apartment, immediately freezing from the cold and pulling his jacket on tighter around him as he started down the street

God he was glad that he lived nearby...

He was always kind of surprised at how empty the streets were at this time of morning

So empty and quiet that it was actually really peacefull

The rain was getting harder though, wich shook him out of his soft and weirdly nostalgic mindset, causing him to walk a little bit faster in an effort to get home sooner

As he walked though, the sound of someone crying started to echo through the streets

His natural instinct was to find out who was crying and why, to see if they needed help and, if they did, if he could be the one to give them that help, but he had no idea what direction the sound was even coming from

It was almost.... panoramic or something....

"Hello?" he called out, starting to practically jog down the street in search of the stranger

"Hey... is anybody there?"

The crying was getting louder, so he must be getting closer... right?

"Hey!! If you can hear me, can you tell me where you are!?"

He had broken into a full on run now, searching almost desperately for the person causing the sound, but he still couldn't find them...

"Hello!!?"

He was going in circles...

He had to be going in circles, everything looked the same, there was no change in his scenery at all even though he had been running for what must have been more than five minutes already, but...

Somehow he was still in the same neighborhood, in the same sector, like he hadn't moved at all...

He could feel his breathing starting to increase, his anxiety growing higher and higher as he ran around looking for the noise as it grew louder and louder...

The rain was pounding down around him, he was chilled to the bone and he felt like he was about to have an anxiety attack any minute now, what... what....

 _In touch with the ground_  
I'm on the hunt down, I'm after you  
Smell like I sound, I'm lost in a crowd  
And I'm hungry like the wolf

The sound of his ringtone brought him suddenly back to reality, and just like that, the crying was gone

It wasn't like it.... stopped.... exactly, more like it was just utterly _gone_ , if that made any sense

He licked his lips, swallowing as he reached down to shakily take his phone out of his pocket, relieved for Derek's call as he hurried to answer

"Hey babe.... no, I'm not home yet,"

 

~+~

 

"Hi,"

Lydia smiled softly, her eyes still closed as she curled closer to the woman next to her

"Hi," she echoed quietly back

"You sleep well?"

The banshee gave a slow nod, stretching out slightly as she wrapped her arms around her partner

"I'm so glad we have late shifts today..."

Well, late by their standards anyhow

"Those 24 hour shifts finally paid off huh?" Allison grinned back teasingly, reaching out to card her fingers through Lydia's hair

"Mmmm.... mm-hm," Lydia purred back, snuggling lazily into her girlfreind's chest

It had been a long, long time since Lydia had had a lazy day, and God was she ready for one

"Why don't we take a shower... get dressed, and go out for late brunch?"

"Sounds amazing..."

"You do know that'll require ACTUALLY getting up though, right?" Allison smirked teasingly

Lydia groaned, wrinkling her nose but finally opening her eyes and staring up at the woman next to her

"You could get up first..." she suggested, resisting the urge to yawn

Allison rolled her eyes playfully, reluctantly pushing the blankets back and starting to move out of bed

_"Fiiiiine..."_

Lydia smirked, shifting a little to burrow deeper under the covers

"I'm going to brush my teeth, then I'll start the shower and come and get you when it's warm, ok?"

Lydia nodded, closing her eyes again so she could grab a few extra moments of light twilight sleep and listening to the other woman as she padded out of the room

She and Lydia weren't as new of a development as they may look on the surface, they had actually been flirting quite a bit with eachother back and forth for years and it was sort of about time that they officially became a couple

The other night, with Lydia comforting Allison after her terrifying flatline, it had just... evolved naturally

And Allison couldn't be more happy that it had

She had already made herself at home in Lydia's apartment back when they were just close freinds, she had a spare toothbrush here and everything, so in a way it was like they had been preparing for this for a wile

She hadn't felt this good in ages, and as she slipped the toothbrush in her mouth, all she could think about was Lydia

About that perfect night and the perfect morning-afternoon she had planned...

It looked like life might actually get back on track now that all of the craziness of flatlining was over, who knew the best way to live was to die first?

Her head was clouded with all of this, barely paying attention to how long she had been brushing her teeth and leaning down to spit into the sink when she figured an approximate two minutes had passed, when she looked back up into the mirror she expected to just see herself, but...

Instead, she saw herself... and her aunt Kate standing behind her

She didn't even have the chance to scream before her aunt had gripped her by the back of the head, shoving her forward and slamming her skull into the mirror in front of her

 

~+~

 

Panic

Derek hadn't felt this much panic in what felt like years

He wasn't even that close with Allison, but flatlining must have been some sort of weird, bonding experience because now the though that something terrible had happened to her was shaking him to the core

He rushed past the nurses in front of him, sliding into the exam room with a pounding heart and tremors shaking down through his body

Allison was.... well, actually, she looked pretty ok

A few stitches in her head and looking in general a little worse for wear but she was actually pretty much ok...

He released a breath, head tilting back just long enough for the momentary releif to sink in

"What the HELL happened?" he finally snarled

He wasn't angry at Lydia or Allison, but just.... at the circumstances, he supposed

Granted he didn't really know what the circumstances WERE yet but something about it...

Something about it made him incredibly uneasy

"She hit her head on the mirror this morning, that's all," Lydia explained, pressing a towel-covered ice pack to Allison's head

"That wasn't exactly all," Allison said quietly, glancing down at the floor

"What? What happened?"

The human inhaled a deep breath, clearly bracing herself before finally turning her attention towards him again

"I saw my aunt," she explained quietly

That.... was definitely not what he had been expecting to hear

"You saw your aunt?" he echoed slowly, just to make sure he had heard her right

"My DEAD aunt," she added a beat later

Yeah, that made it better....

"Look, I know this sounds crazy but she's the one who slammed my head into the mirror, please... please believe me,"

It DID sound crazy

But to be fair, so did the concept of flatlining

"I think she was just dreaming, she was tired, she fell asleep-"

"I did NOT fall asleep and slam my head into a mirror!" Allison argued

Things went quiet for a few short moments before Derek took a breath, looking up to meet Allison's eyes again

"Alright, I believe you, so what are we going to do about it? Go ghost hunting...?"

"I don't know, this has never happened before," Allison replied quietly

"Maybe Lydia can suggest something, she's a banshee after all," he suggested with a slight shrug, turning towards Lydia and raising an eyebrow expectingly

It was odd that she hadn't said anything yet, she had been fairly quick to jump in before but now things were just... oddly quiet....

"Lydia?" he asked, stepping closer and waving a hand slowly in front of her face

Not only did she not move or say anything, she didn't even blink...

"Lydia? Do you hear me?" he asked a little bit louder

Still nothing

"She must be having a vision,"

"Is that.... bad?"

"Not necessarily, I mean... it probably isn't GOOD but-"

"Stiles," Lydia said suddenly, abruptly interrupting the conversation

"What about Sti-"

"STILES!!" she shouted, nocking Derek out of the way as she rushed out of the exam room

It wasn't a scream though, Derek had heard her scream, he had heard her scream for death and this wasn't it, this was...

Well, in all honesty he didn't really know what this was

All he DID know was that he needed to follow her- _immediately_

He hurried out of the room behind her, his heart racing with anxiety as he rushed down the halls with her, only noticing a moment later that they were heading towards the elevators

And when he rounded the corner, he could see that Stiles was walking towards them too

Well.... not quite "walking" he supposed, so much as almost running, a panicked look on his face as he rushed towards the small line of elevators in front of him

There was just one big problem with this

Only two of the elevators worked, the third one had been out of commission for a long time and all that was there now was an empty elevator shaft

And that just so happened to be the elevator he was walking towards

He suddenly had a very real idea of what Lydia's vision might be and felt his heart clench, racing towards the witch, right behind Lydia, and reaching out to grab his arm, jerking him sharply towards them

Maybe not the nicest way to get someone's attention, but surely the most effective

"Stiles!!! Stiles! WAKE. UP.!"

The witch gasped, suddenly aware of his surroundings again- or atleast so it seemed- as he suddenly blinked back to reality

"What.... what? What happened?"

Derek licked his lips, the tension between the small group growing even worse as the seconds ticked by

"I think we'd all like to know that ourselves..."

 

~+~

 

"I think something bad is happening to us here, to all of us,"

"No offense but I sort of figured..."

"No no, I mean to ALL of us, think about it, Allison is seeing her aunt, I'm seeing.... I'm seeing my mom, haven't you had any... you know, close encounters with the ghostly kind lately?"

Derek glanced down, averting his eyes

"I... may have seen some things,"

Or heard some things, maybe more specifically

Stiles didn't ask what they were, and Derek was appreciative of that

"What about you guys?"

"I haven't," Kira said with a small shrug

Scott fidgeted a little, clearly not too keen on admitting to whatever he may have seen

"I.. yeah, I've seen a couple of weird things, not people but... I saw lacrosse balls in the hallway this morning, and I heard my old lacrosse coach's wistle last night,"

"Ok.... so, that kinda rules out the 'seeing dead people' theory," Stiles said with a slight frown

"Anyone else have any ideas?" Derek asked

"Maybe.... it isn't people who died but... things we miss?" Kira suggested

"I mean, that might explain it? Allison misses her aunt, Stiles misses his mom, Scott misses lacrosse, I... don't really miss anyone or anything major..."

"No," Derek said immediately, shaking his head

"I.... wouldn't apply to that, trust me,"

He definitely, definitely, didn't miss... _her_....

"Back to square one," Lydia said with a loud sigh

"I'll research it," Stiles offered

"I'm good at looking into stuff like this, until then, none of us should be alone, we need to make sure that whatever is going on, it doesn't get a leg up,"

"Kira and I work the same shift, but... we're in different departments," Scott offered with a frown

"That's the problem, all of us are working in different places, I'm in neurosurgery, Kira in pediatrics, Allison is in general surgery, Derek in emergency, Scott's trying for family medicine so he's making the rounds but he's in infant care right now, and you... you're a paramedic, you don't even work in the building most of the day,"

"So then what do we do? We can't just let eachother go and hope that whatever this is doesn't try to kill us again in the mean time,"

"I don't know... you work with Malia right? Can you just.... get her to keep an eye on you?" Scott suggested

"Sure, but who's gonna keep an eye on the rest of YOU? Especially in feilds where you can't exactly keep track of eachother like Derek's,"

He had a point, Derek was all over the road even on a slow day, having anyone who would be close enough to him all day and be able to notice and stop any odd behavior would be next to impossible

"Then we have to go with it on our own, be more aware of things that don't seem right and try not to give into them," Derek explained

It wasn't an ideal solution

Hell it wasn't a solution at all

But it was all they could do and they'd have to work with it

 

~+~

 

"I'll be back in a few hours ok Chloe? Tell me how it ends," Kira said with a bright smile, finally shutting the door to the room and heaving a quiet sigh

It was times like this when she actually wished she was a nurse instead of a doctor, if she was a nurse she could actually spend a little more time with her young patients and not have to rush out every time her work was finished...

But on the bright side, her shift was almost finished and she had been keeping in touch with everyone else in the group nearly every hour, no one was seeming to have any problems- not that they confessed to anyway

It had to be a good sign right?

She would choose to believe that it was and make her way towards the nurse's station to check in and see who she needed to visit next

She had technically finished her rounds and with new people being admitted every so often....

She was about half way there when a familiar sound caught her attention

It sounded like metal scraping against metal...

Like.... like a sword being sharpened....

Her stomach sank, going pale as she tried to keep herself focused, keep walking, don't turn around, don't give any attention to whatever was making the noise

But it just kept getting louder and louder .. and she was starting to feel a pressure in her chest, her heart beating faster, her anxiety increasing as she started to pick up the pace

She was walking as fast as she could without flat-out running, and she knew people were staring, some had even started calling out to her, but she couldn't pay any attention to that, she couldn't ... not when she was so close to being away from there

She decided to forego the nurse's station for now, she'd make her way back to it once this... this... THING was out of her head

This ear worm or whatever anyone wanted to call it

She could see the stairwell up ahead, and although it was typically advised to use the elevators unless there was an emergency, the elevators were further away, and she wanted to get away from that awfull, awfull sound NOW

She was almost there... she was so close!

She hurried to swing open the door, but before she could take a step, she gasped, stumbling as a sword plunged up from the first step towards her

The stumbling nocked her off balance and before her reflexes could kick in she found herself falling backwards down the stair case, tumbling until she landed on the first platform, a good twenty-five steps later

 

~+~

 

Everyone was shaken after Kira's fall

She healed, thankfully, having only had minor wounds to begin with and having good ol' kitsune healing kicking in to take care of whatever damage was sustained

But it was slower than werewolf healing and the fact that she could have so easily fallen to her death had everyone practically petrified

If there was any good news at all, it was that Kira had gotten the next day off work for obvious reasons, and by some sheer force of fate, Stiles happened to have the day off too

Atleast Derek felt a breath of peace that his boyfreind and Kira would be spending the day together, from the moment he went to work until the moment he came home, and likely after, at that, there was no reason to not exploit the safety in numbers thing to it's absolute fullest

Stiles, however, was FAR less pleased

The fact that other four were still going to work- totally in harm's way and completely out of eachother's range- had him sick to his stomach

Lydia, atleast, hadn't flatlined, so there was no need to worry about her beyond the typical banshee stuff that she had long been in control of anyway

But the other three....

Stiles had _begged_ Derek not to go to work

Derek had refused

There was nothing they could do about any of it now, it was late at night, everyone was at home or at their partner's home (and Stiles had never been happier that they had somehow all managed to couple up with eachother, leaving no loose ends and no possibilities for anyone to walk off a ledge in the middle of the night or something) and Stiles...

Stiles was still awake, hopped up on more coffee than any one person should probably reasonably have and staring down at the laptop in front of him in the hopes that he could finally get some answers

But he was freaking _exhausted_ and his eyes were stinging and unfocused and he so deeply craved the idea of sleep, but...

But he had to keep going

The sooner he had an answer to this, the sooner everyone would be safe

"Are you still up?" Derek mumbled quietly from the bedroom doorway

"Stiles.... you need to sleep,"

"Can't- research," the witch replied almost robotically

Yeah.... THAT didn't sound unhealthy at all....

"I'm serious... even if you aren't working tommorrow, you really need to sleep... you're not going to accomplish anything this way,"

All Derek received for his efforts was an indignant snort

The thing is, exhaustion, anxiety, and frustration were not a good blend for Derek, so it was really no surprise when he walked over to the kitchen table where Stiles was currently sitting, and gently picked him up, hoisting him easily over his shoulder

"Wah- ... HEY!!"

"You can research more tommorrow, but I swear to God Stiles if you try to go back to that laptop I'll kill you myself,"

Stiles didn't actually believe him, ofcourse, but he was too tired to argue about it

(Wow, he really DID need to sleep...)

"My laptop..." the witch wimpered as Derek slotted him into bed and pulled the blankets up over him

"I'll shut it down, I promise," he soothed quietly

Stiles seemed to believe him, for what it was worth, that or he was just too exhausted to possibly try staying awake any longer

Either way, he was passed out now, and Derek was going to make good on his promise to save the laptop from being on all night

He headed back out into the kitchen, bookmarking the web pages Stiles had open just in case and closing them before shutting the computer down

He figured he should probably unplug it too, although Derek himself didn't know much about electronics or proper laptop treatment, he knew Stiles was kind of obsessive over his computer being taken care of

So once it was off he shut the lid, pulled out the cord, and went to take the other end out of the wall, when suddenly he smelled something... something... horrible

He smelled _smoke_

Panic filled his veins, he hurried to tear the plug out of the wall before rushing into the kitchen again, the smell of smoke getting stronger and stronger as he went

Stronger and more nauseating, making him cough and choke as it filled his lungs

He grabbed a dish towel from the oven handle, putting it over his face and looking around desperately for the fire causing all of this smoke, but to no avail

He realized, a little too late, that the smoke alarm wasn't going off...

The smoke alarm wasn't going off so...

So this wasn't real

It couldn't be, right?

If there was really a fire then the alarm would be going off wouldn't it?

He took a deep breath, closing his eyes and trying to will himself to stop smelling the smoke, but as he backed up to put the towel back down, his hand happened to land on one of the stove burners....

And Derek screamed loudly enough to wake up his neighbors

 

~+~

 

"I haven't used the stove in days," the werewolf said with a tired sigh, staring down at Scott as they walked towards the cafeteria

"Maybe Stiles turned it on?"

"No.... I would have smelled the gas if he had, and he swears he didn't anyhow, I believe him,"

Scott looked understandably troubled by all of his, and hell, Derek FELT troubled by it, so he could perfectly understand why

It looked like even their buddy system wasn't going to completely work...

He was just relieved when they spotted Kira and Stiles at one of the tables in the back, Stiles already waving enthusiastically towards them as the werewolves hurried to get to the table

Stiles had called earlier saying he had found something, if that was true, then the sooner they got the information, the better

"You guys survived another day I see, where are Allison and Lydia?"

"Allison's in surgery, I'm not completely sure where Lydia is," Scott explained as he pulled up a chair

"Ok, well, then I guess we'll have to fill them in later huh?"

"Provided what you found is reasonable," Derek agreed

Stiles nodded, taking a deep breath before saying a single word

"Bardo,"

"...Come again?"

"Bardo, the space between life and death, sorta like limbo or purgatory I guess, depending on your spiritual veiws, there are some differences ofcourse but honestly I didn't really look at in depth THAT much you know? I'm pretty sure I know what this is so why wait, right?"

"You think we're in some kind of purgatory?" Scott asked skeptickally

"Well... yes and no," Kira corrected

"Purgatory is a holding place in Christianity between life and Heaven, when you die, if you aren't purified, you go to purgatory until you are, then move onto Heaven, you serve penance there in one way or another, but bardo is a state between death and rebirth, it's what you have to experience before you can move on to the next life and involves hallucinations regarding the wrongs you've committed in the life you just left, you have to make peace with them, and karma will repay you in your next life for lessons you didn't learn and wrong-doings you did in this life, to be honest... I'm not all that familiar with it either, my grandpa is Buddhist so most of what I know about it comes from him,"

"But don't you have to be dead for this.. bardo thing to happen?" Derek frowned

"Ish? There are different types of bardo, some can be acheived just through meditation, but that's not the important part, look, people who have near-death-experiences often report having a flashback of their lives before coming back to life, one wherein they felt all of the bad things they had done, what if we're kind of experiencing an... outwards... version of that?"

"If that was the case then why don't other NDEs report hallucinations like this after the fact?"

"Because they finished their flashbacks? Because they didn't mess with the laws of nature? I don't know, but doesn't it sound atleast KINDA similar to what we're going through here?"

He hated to admit it.... but Stiles had a point

"In bardo.... the entire point of bardo is to prepare you to move on to your next life, it's what you go through before you can be reborn, but what if we're taking that too literally?" Kira asked suddenly

"Nearly everyone who's ever experienced flatlining- not... not on purpose, ofcourse- has gone on to change their lives, they become new people, more aware, more spiritual, more at peace and compassionate, like a-"

"Rebirth," Scott said slowly

"Right, but we didn't, all we experienced were some different talents and new skills, don't you think that's odd?"

"But why would we differ from the rest?"

"Who knows? Maybe it's the laws of nature thing, maybe it's because none of us are human- well, except Allison.. I guess.. but none of that matters right now, the point is we have a good idea of what's going on here and we need to nip it in the bud before it gets completely out of hand,"

"How do we do that?" Scott frowned

"Right our wrongs, it's all we can think of, we need to get rid of this guilt we're feeling and since there's no magic button to push to just go 'Oh I don't feel guilty anymore' then righting our wrongs is sort of the only way,"

"That may not work for everyone," Derek frowned

"I think ... I think we need to tell eachother what we we did, what we feel guilty about, maybe... maybe there will be some kind of closure in that?" Kira suggested softly

"Closure," Stiles repeated slowly

"Closure would be good,"

Things were quiet for a moment, a long, tense silence before Scott spoke up

"So.... who wants to go first?"

More silence, before finally Kira cleared her throat, shifting slightly in her chair

"I... I cheated on my test,"

"Ok, well, that one is easy, just find your highschool math teacher or whoever and take a make up test or something," Stiles shrugged easily

"No no... I ... I cheated on my test... as a kitsune,"

A pause

"Swing that by us again?"

"When kitsune mature as adults we're required to show our powers to a mentor, to take a test, if you will, to prove that we're in control, and I... I cheated on mine.... I wasn't in control, my powers have always been more off-end and reckless than I'm comfortable with but ... I couldn't risk failing, if I failed I'd be sent away,"

"Well that's awfully harsh," Stiles frowned

"It's ... common practice, if a kitsune can't control their powers they have to train for a hundred years with ascended masters, I couldn't... put my life on hold for a hundred years, even if that would only be a drop in the bucket for me age wise... I'd miss everything, I'd come back into the world a stranger, pop culture, government, medicine all would be so different and alien.... I could never ask Scott to wait that long, or anyone, my human freinds would all be dead, everyone else would have moved on, and .... if anything were to have happened to my family I wouldn't find out .... I couldn't do that, I couldn't stand the thought so... so I took some Foxglove before the test started, just enough to dull my powers a little, just enough to make them controllable, it worked... I've been trying so HARD ever since to make things right, to get in control, and now I actually AM in control of my powers, I know that I am, but ... cheating on that test.... it's such a horrible thing to have done, my mom will be devastated..."

"But she can't punish you for it or anything can she? I mean, it isn't like she can send you off for a hundred years just as a punishment right?"

"No... I'll have to retake the test, wich is fine, I think I can pass on my own now, but... as far as repercussions, she'll take my tail, bu-"

"Wait wait.... say that again?"

"My - ... not a REAL tail, it's... it's symbolic, it holds power, but it's also a type of accomplishment, when kitsune make accomplishments we get tails, it's a really big deal, it can't be awarded for just anything but... typically passing the rest awards the first one, now... it'll be taken, destroyed... I'll earn it back someday but..."

"I know it'll be hard, but trust me, your life is worth it," Scott said quietly, reaching out to gently squeeze his girlfreind's hand before turning his attention back to the task at hand

"I .. don't exactly have the cleanest record either," Scott confessed quietly, head hung as he started to fidget, eyes downcast

"Stiles... do you remember the last lacrosse game we played in highschool? The one that got me my scholarship?"

"Yeah, the one where that kid Liam got hurt right? Scott, I know you've always felt guilty about that because he was pretty much a shoe-in but you can't change the fac-"

"I hurt him," Scott interrupted, watching a mix of shock and disbeleif cross his freind's face

"Scott... you couldn't have-"

"I did, I .. I wanted to win that game... I wanted to win it myself you know? To get the scholarship... I NEEDED it.... so I wolfed out on the feild, I never meant for anybody to get hurt but... I just wanted the speed boost, Liam was so impossibly fast... but we ended up colliding when we both went after the ball and when I slammed into him..."

"Your werewolf strength nocked him down hard enough for him to break his arm," Stiles concluded quietly

And given the look on Scott's face, he'd be willing to bet he had hit the nail on the head

"He doesn't know, ofcourse, but... it's my fault, if I had played fair... if I hadn't used my powers like that... he wouldn't have gotten hurt and he would have gotten the scholarship he deserved,"

"Liam..." Derek said slowly, eyebrows nitted as he stared down at the table, trying to peice some things together

"Liam.... wouldn't happen to be Liam Dunbar would he?"

"How did you know?" Scott asked in shock

"I know him, recognized the story, if you decide to contact him and... take care of this, just let me know, I can get you in touch with him,"

Scott looked... surprised, to put it mildly, but he seemed to adjust to it well enough

And then, all of a sudden, the attention was all on Stiles

And Stiles....

Stiles really didn't know what exactly to do with that

"You guys can apologize pretty easily for what you did, you know, make up for it and all that... lies and some cheating, big deal, it won't be so easy for me,"

"You... said you saw your mom, right?" Scott asked quietly, shifting a little in his chair

"Yeah," Stiles mumbled quietly, letting his teeth sink into his lip for a moment as he carefully debated the words that were going to come out next

"I feel guilty about her death.... because I'm the one who caused it,"

Things suddenly went tenser than they had been all day

Stiles felt like he could probably hear a pin drop...

"Stiles.... you didn't, I don't know why you're saying this but... she was sick, she had Frontal Temporal Dementia, that isn't your fault,"

"Maybe not, but her death is," he insisted quietly

"I... I know my mom was sick, and ... she wasn't going to make it much longer but she didn't have to die the way that she did, she didn't have to die the DAY that she did, that... that was my fault, she was having a good day you know? The morning was.... nice, we were going to make cookies and have an X-Files marathon, but... but then she started to get bad again, she ... she started to have an episode that afternoon and... and she TOLD me before not to run off without telling her where I was going but... but I did anyway, I just.. I was so selfish, you know? To leave her like that, I didn't want to hear it anymore... go through it anymore... it made me nervous, so when she wasn't looking I ran out... I went to ride my bike, I left her there all alone and when she came back to her senses she came after me, she was so scared, not knowing where I was, she ran outside and.... she missed a step, and she hit her head on the one of the porch steps... if I had been there, if it hadn't taken me ... if I hadn't had to ride home from the end of the street I would have gotten there sooner, I could have saved her! The EMTs could have saved her, if I had just... not left to begin with then none of it would have happened!"

"Stiles... that wasn't your fault, you were just a kid, you couldn't have known..."

"But I SHOULD have, I'd been living with it long enough! I'm the reason all of this happened, my mom wouldn't have died like that- hurting and... and scared and alone- if it hadn't been for me, my dad probably would have gotten the chance to say goodbye if it hadn't been for me, it's my fault.... it's all my-"

"It's not your fault," Derek said firmly, his jaw clearly tight and tense, hands clenched in front of him as he stared across the table at his boyfreind

"I know blame, Stiles, I know fault, and what you have.... it isn't this, I'm the reason my family is dead, it was my ex who burned our house down with everyone locked in the basement when my sisters and I were at a basketball game, that was ... THAT was fault, but what you did? Stiles... that was just a child desperate for an escape from pain, you can't blame yourself for that,"

"Not any more than you can blame yourself for what you just said, your EX killed your family right? Last time I checked that meant someone else operating as an independent person and not, you know, you acting through her- or him- as some kind of gollum or proxy, unless you somehow forced your ex to kill your family, then you weren't responsible for their deaths!" Stiles insisted loudly- maybe a little too loudly if the way some of the other people in the cafeteria started to stare at them had any say in things

There was something of a silent agreement around the table at that point that they should all lower their voices a little, Stiles may have been the one to draw the attention of the cafeteria, but they had all been steadily getting louder from the past few sentences

"Look, I understand how you could feel like .. like all that happened was because of you, but it wasn't, I swear it, and I cou-"

"It doesn't matter," Derek interrupted quietly

"It doesn't really matter if we are, in fact, responsible for the stuff we're feeling guilty about, if your theory is right, all that matters is that we feel guilty about it, and we have to find a way to alleviate that guilt,"

"Derek is right, getting the secrets out there is a good start but... ultimately we aren't going to make all of this stop by just sitting here and sharing stories, we have to do something proactive, we have to find a way to absolve ourselves... or atleast forgive ourselves," Kira agreed

"That may work for you and Scott, but Stiles and I feel that we wronged people who are dead,"

"But... my dad is still alive, I took his chance to say goodbye to my mom... and your sisters and cousin are still alive too, maybe.... I can apologize to him and you can apologize to them?"

Derek hung his head, clearly not happy with the idea, but there weren't alot of other options, so he gave a short, single nod, apparently agreeing

"Then Kira and I will start with this, we'll stay together, how long are you guys going to be stuck here?"

"Five more hours for me," Scott answered

"I'm here until late tommorrow morning," Derek answered, earning an irritated look from his boyfreind

"Stiles, there's nothing I can do about it, you know overnights are common in the E.R., especially with residents,"

"I know but.... alright, alright.... when we're done, Kira and I will come back, she'll pick up Scott and go take care of Liam, I'll stay here with Derek,"

"What are you going to do Stiles? Spend fifteen hours in the cafeteria?"

"If I have to!"

"Wait a minute," Kira interrupted, successfully drawing the attention of the three men around her

"I think we're forgetting something... what about Allison? We don't know how she fits into all of this, or even when she'll be able to talk about it,"

"We can find Lydia, talk to her, find out when Allison is supposed to be out of surgery, maybe we can pull her aside and talk to her about it wile you guys are gone," Scott suggested

"It isn't the best plan I've ever heard but it'll have to do for now," Stiles agreed

"Alright," Derek finally said, still not exactly pleased but knowing that there weren't alot of other choices available

"We'll be back soon, you two be safe until then," Kira said softly, standing from her seat before leaning over to give Scott a gentle kiss on the forehead

"If anything- ANYTHING happens, you know who to call," Stiles instructed

"Ghostbusters?" Derek teased

Stiles just snorted, rolling his eyes and giving him a quick kiss

"Not unless you suddenly start dating someone with a plasma gun,"

"I'll keep that in mind," Derek teased back, glancing over his shoulder and watching anxiously as Kira and Stiles headed out of the cafeteria

"They'll be fine," Scott promised, reaching out and gently patting Derek's shoulder

"I hope you're right," the older wolf mused quietly

"I really, really, hope you're right..."

 

~+~

 

"Are you sure about this?"

"To be completely honest with you .... I'm not sure about ANYTHING at this point, but it's all I have,"

Kira seemed to understand that easily enough, glancing out the window as Stiles drove towards her mother's house

She had been keeping this secret for so long now, it would be a releif to finally get it off of her shoulders, or... so she hoped

She knew her mother would be disappointed in her- and she actually wasn't sure if she'd be more disappointed about Kira cheating on the test... or about her flatlining experiments...- but surely she would understand right?

She hoped so....

The kitsune shifted in her seat, leaning against the window and taking a deep breath... just in time to see a horrible, horrible image approaching outside

It was Scott....

Scott _dead_ , with several swords stabbed through his body, blood soaking everywhere, his cold, lifeless eyes seeming to follow her as the car drove towards her parents' house

The image seemed to follow her, and even though she knew it was fake- a hallucination, not there... not there....- it still had her chilled to the core

"Kira?"

She blinked, taking a shaking breath as she turned her attention back to Stiles

"You ok?"

"Yeah... yeah I'm... I'm fine," he mumbled back, biting her lip

"I just... just...."

"Saw something? Yeah... I know the feeling," he said with a sigh, suddenly putting the car in park

It was only then that Kira realized they were at the house, wich... should have been a good half hour drive from the hospital, even though it clearly hadn't been....

How long had she been staring out the window...?

"You want me to go in with you?"

"No I... I'll be fine," Kira promised as she unbuckled her seatbelt

"I'd rather do this alone, if I'm honest, I mean no offense but-"

"No, none taken, I want to tackle mine on my own too so I get it,"

It was only as she had opened the car door, half-slid out, that something occured to her

"Are you ... going to be ok here alone?"

"I'll be fine," Stiles promised with a shrug

"I promise, seriously, I'm gonna lock the car doors, I'm just going to sit here with the radio on and play solitaire on my phone,"

Kira hesitated, but... she really wanted to do this alone, so she finally nodded, giving a tight smile before shutting the door and heading inside

Well... time to face her fears.....

 

~+~

 

"Lydia!! Hey!" Scott called, rushing towards the strawberry-blonde as she finally left the NCCU, making her way back into the main hallway

The banshee turned her head, but didn't stop walking

Well, atleast it was an acknowledgement...

"Do you know how much longer Allison will be in surgery?" Scott asked, finally managing to catch up to the other resident

"I don't, she went in a few hours ago but all I know is that she's assisting with a transplant, I don't know what kind, who it's on, or even if the organ is already here, it could be any minute... or a few hours from now, why?"

"Stiles and Kira came up with something that might be happening, it's... I don't know what to think of it but Derek and I are on board,"

Finally, Lydia turned around, eyebrows raised expectingly as she leaned against the wall behind her

"I'm listening,"

 

~+~

 

_You told me not to be like anybody else  
Headspin, happiness, death_

"C'mon.... I just need one red six..." Stiles muttered in frustration

He was SO. CLOSE. to finishing this game.... so close... if he could just get one more freaking red six he could get the entire game figured out!

_Be like anybody else  
Bowed down, nothing else left_

Hell...

He wasn't going to get it, it was clearly burried under one of the cards he couldn't move...

He was just going to have to make peace with the fact that he'd have to start a new game...

He sighed, moving his thumb over the "Options" button and tapping on "New Game"

_"Stiles?"_

Stiles jerked his head up, heart pounding and nearly dropping his phone as the color drained from his face

_"Stiles? Where are you?! Stiles!!?!"_

That was... that was his mother's voice.... coming from the radio....

_"Stiles where are you!? Stiles!!"_

Heart racing, he hurried to reach out and turn the radio off, his fingers trembling as he stared down at it

...

Good, quiet, this... this was good

Swallowing tightly, he turned back to his game, licking his lips

Alright, an ace right in front, good... good...

_"Why did you do it Stiles?"_

He felt his heart sink, his stomach dropping

_"Why did you kill me?"_

"Stop it! You're not real.... you're not... you're not real...."

_"Why were you such an evil child? Why did you have to kill me!?"_

"I didn't!! I didn't kill you!"

_"You did... you KNOW that you did, even before you ran away from me, you had been killing me from the day you were born! It was so hard to take care of you, so painfull, so.... annoying, any mother would have caved under the pressure of trying to keep you in line, you killed me Stiles.... and now you're killing your father,"_

"Stop it!!!! Stop! Stop! I'm not... I'm not-"

_"Yes you are, I should have killed you when I had the chance, I should have drowned you to spare myself!"_

Stiles screamed, cranking the engine and shaking as he hurried to unlock the doors

Before he could get them unlocked however, he felt hands on his shoulders, and was suddenly shoved forward, his head banging into the steering weel

He hit his head again and again, his hands scrambling to unbuckle his seatbelt and unlock the doors, pushing the door open and practically jumping out, hitting the pavement with a gasp of agony and quickly crawling backwards into the grass

He was shaking

Every part of him was shaking, breathing heavily, just trying to get ahold of his nerves before they choked him to death

He didn't even hear Kira approaching him until she started talking, but the moment she said his name, he nearly jumped off of the ground

"Stiles? Stiles what happened?!"

"I'm fine," he squeaked quietly, swallowing and shakily climbing up to his feet

"I'm fine..."

"What happened?" Kira repeated worriedly

"I just... nothing, it's nothing, how did it go?"

Kira clearly didn't believe him, but decided not to press further, gently taking his hand and leading him back towards the car

"It went.... well, better than I expected to be perfectly honest," she said softly, heading towards the passanger side door as Stiles climbed back into the driver's seat

"Seriously? That's awesome! So she isn't going to take your tail away?" he asked hopefully

"Well... no, no, she still took my tail, but she ... was more understanding I guess, I mean, she's not ... raging mad or anything, and she forgives me, although she's a little hesitant to let me keep doing overnights at the hospital, not that I have alot of choice in the matter but you know what I mean,"

"Basically one more strike and she's going to yank you out of medicine and make you repay your college fund?"

"Something like that," she said with a slight snort, buckling herself in again

"But she understood and that's the important thing,"

"Yeah.... yeah, that's what matters," Stiles agreed, starting to pull out of the driveway

"I bet your dad will understand too, more than anything,"

Stiles wasn't nearly as sure, but he was willing to try anything to get the hallucinations to stop

Even if it meant breaking his father's heart and ruining their relationship from now on...

 

~+~

 

"I think we're about ready to close,"

Allison let out a slow exhale against her mask, glad that they were finally- hopefully- going to be finished with this surgery and give her a chance to breathe

She had been feeling kind of odd for the last hour now, almost shaky

She was keeping herself steady though, carefully avoiding showing the nervousness she felt

If she had learned anything from archery, it was definitely how to keep a steady hand no matter what the circumstances were

"Argent, suction,"

She snapped out of her thoughts, nodding and leaning over to do as she was told, her eyes flicking unconsciously up towards the patient's face and suddenly feeling her heart leap into her throat, practically panicking as she stared

It was her aunt's face...

She knew within reason that this was just a hallucination, but it didn't spook her any less that she was seeing Kate's face, especially when her eyes suddenly blinked open, turning and staring intensely at Allison

"Soon this will be you," she said, her voice echoing around the young surgeon like surround sound

Allison was frozen, she didn't know what to do or how to process it- or even if she should...

And then-

"Argent!"

Allison blinked, color draining from her face as she glanced up at the attending surgeon, giving a shaking nod and going back to work

She couldn't get distracted, she couldn't let this happen again....

 

~+~

 

"Want me to wait here?"

Stiles nodded slowly, taking a quivering breath and slowly slipped out of the jeep, his feet hitting the pavement as a chill traveled through his body

"I'll try to be out soon Kira, if you see anything or... hear anything, just come inside ok?"

She gave a supportive thumb's up as he shut the driver's side door and started making his way towards the sheriff's station

He was so nervous that he could just about have a break down right there in front of the station

He took a shaking breath, finally pushing in through the door and heading straight for the back, not even bothering to stop and ask the deputy at the desk if his father was busy or not, he wanted to get this done and over with and he knew that if he waited he would lose his resolve

He steeled himself, forcing his legs to keep walking, fists clenched at his side as he finally got to the sheriff's office and slipped inside, shutting the door behind him

His father, no doubt alerted by the noise of the door, glanced up from his papperwork, a slight smile on his face

"Stiles, this is a nice surprise, what brings you here?"

The witch inhaled deeply, his body tenser than ever as he forced himself to walk a little further, hands perching on one of the chairs in front of the desk

"Dad.... I need to talk to you,"

That caused the smile to fade from his face, instead replaced with a look of dread

"Aw hell... I really don't like the sound of this, what did you do?"

"I killed Mom,"

The sheriff's face formed into one of shock and confusion, then just flat-out disbeleif, mouth falling open

".... What?"

And so, Stiles told him everything

Every word he had told the others and more

And when he had finally finished telling it, his father's face had softened, though the disbeleif was still there

"Son.... you didn't kill your mother," he said slowly

Stiles frowned, opening his mouth, but the sheriff practically saw it coming and held a hand up, silencing him

"I mean it, you were a CHILD, you were just a kid _being_ a kid, alright? It wasn't your fault, it was an accident, a... cruel twist of fate, just as much as her getting sick was, Stiles... I swear to you, her death was not your fault,"

"But... but if it hadn't been for me you might have gotten to say goodbye...." he insisted quietly, his voice cracking with each word

"And I might not have," he said quietly, reaching out and gently taking Stiles' hand

"Stiles, listen to me, it wasn't your fault, it wasn't, even if she hadn't been sick, even if you hadn't been a child, it STILL wouldn't have been your fault, understand?"

No, Stiles didn't understand

But somehow, it felt releiving to hear anyway

 

~+~

 

Allison was relieved to be out of surgery

Hell, "relieved" was an understatement

She needed to be alone for a little wile, destress, get some of the cobwebs out of her mind

She took a deep breath, rubbing her temples as she headed for the elevator and pressed the button, waiting impatiently for it to arrive

The moment it was available she stepped in, moving to the back corner and closing her eyes, breathing in deeply and trying to keep herself calm

She felt like the world was caving in around her and she didn't know why or how to make it stop

It just kept getting worse and worse no matter what she did...

She was happy to hear the elevator door close, even happier to feel the thing actually start to move

Soon she would be able to take her lunch break-... or... what was starting to go on dinner now....- and just.. breathe and let her mind melt and reboot

The elevator shook a little, but it was fine, that was sort of par for the course

These things were old really, it was no surprise

But when it started shaking again- harder the second time- she finally opened her eyes, frustration brimming under her skin

...

Atleast, until she glanced towards the door and saw an affow fly straight towards her

She gasped, ducking quickly and feeling her heart begin to race in her chest as another arrow came towards her

The lights were starting to flicker

The elevator was shaking harder and harder and it was everything she could do to brace herself against the rail on the inside and keep from falling, she turned her gaze over towards the floor counter, watching it fall slowly from number to number as it passed floors

She was still three floors from her destination... so she hurried and pressed the button for the nearest floor, screaming as the elevator came to a sudden, screeching halt, a barrage of arrows flying at her from every angle

One of them was going to hit her, she knew it, she was SURE of it....

But then the door opened, and all of it was gone.... just like that

 

~+~

 

"I just spoke to Erica, Allison's surgery was done thirty minutes ago, we need to find her ASAP," Lydia said quickly, setting the phone down as she turned back towards Scott and Derek

"You'll have to do it without me, my break is over in five minutes," Derek said with a soft sigh

"No offense, but right now I think being right on time for your work is the least of your worries," Lydia huffed

Derek rolled his eyes, in firm disagreement with that

He couldn't slack off just because he was going through some personal problems, if that were the case he'd never work in the first place

He was about to say as much too, but when he turned around to confront Lydia, he found that she was gone

So was Scott

So was... everyone

The hospital was practically a ghost town all of a sudden, complete with the filthy, broken down look, appearing as if no one had been in the building for years

He swallowed tightly, his heart beating a little bit faster as he started walking down the hallway

"Hello?" he called, receiving no answer- ofcourse... what did he expect?

"Is anyone there?"

No answer again, but this time he started to smell something... something like... _smoke..._

Smoke and ash...

And the moment he realized that, smoke started to appear in plumes around him, the ground was covered in ashes, and fire was starting to lick at every inch of the building

It was burning everything around him

The doors, the ceiling, the desk, the floor...

He was shocked into silence

He was just... frozen on the spot

He didn't know how to react or what to do, the flames were getting closer and closer but he couldn't manage to move... he couldn't manage to do much of anything....

He was going to die there, probably

In a way he was ok with that, there was something almost cathardic about it, dieing in flames the way his family had died so many years ago...

"DEREK!!!"

The wolf blinked, and suddenly it was all gone, everything was back to normal

He swallowed hard, turning to glance at Lydia and noticing after a moment that she wasn't the only one who was giving him attention

Everyone in the area was staring at him as if he had grown a second head, and it occured to him that he had probably been walking around in a fog for several minutes... _atleast_

He glanced over at Scott, taking a breath as the other wolf took a step towards him

"I... think it might be time for you to consider taking a sick day..."

 

~+~

 

"We'll be there as soon as we can, trust me, we're on our way now,"

Stiles had been regulated to the passenger's seat as of his return to the jeep, Kira had quickly judged that he was in no condition to be driving and ... well, there really was no such thing as arguing with Kira...

He had spent around an hour at the station talking to his father about everything, and .. he really meant _everything_

He got things off of his chest that had been festering for close to twenty years, and he heard his father say things that he had long ago thought he was just incapable of saying

But he had longed to hear them anyway

It had been kind of amazing if he was being completely honest, and he did feel oddly lighter inside, like a weight had been lifted from his chest

"We're on our way there now," he added as he leaned back in his seat

"I ... yeah, yeah I think it helped," he said with a slow nod, glancing out the window

He felt different, beyond just being lighter

He felt more at peace, and the weird, creeping, "something is wrong" feeling that he had had since the beginning of all of this was completely gone

All he could do now is hope that it stayed that way

"We'll be there soon, promise,"

 

~+~

 

"So he said it was working?"

"He said that he thought it was working," Derek corrected

"Then it sounds like this might just be the solution,"

"In other words, we need to figure out what you feel guilty about so we can fix it ASAP," Scott clarified- not that that actually NEEDED to be clarified

Allison looked down, hanging her head and avoiding eye contact

"I already know," she said quietly

"Well that's great! I mean... that's half the battle right?"

Somehow, Derek had a feeling that "great" didn't at all describe how Allison was feeling about all of this

"Scott... the person I need to apologize to ... is you,"

"Me? Why would you feel guilty about anything to do with me?"

"Because... because there's something I didn't tell you back when we were dating, something I still haven't told you honestly,"

She took a breath, finally allowing herself to glance up at the wolf across from her

"My family are hunters, my dad and I... we stopped years ago, not that long after I met you, we stopped hunting in the traditional sense, now we just... we protect people who can't protect themselves, but before that... before that we were basically like everyone else, my mom killed alot of innocent people, my aunt, my grandpa, even my dad did sometimes.... I'm sorry, I... I know I should have told you upfront, or .. at some point in our relationship, after all of these years... but I just couldn't,"

For a few minutes, everything was quiet

No one said anything, no one DID anything... until Scott leaned over and gave her a soft, gentle hug, allowing his head to rest against her shoulder

"Allison... I get it, you don't need to feel guilty about that, ok? I promise... I understand, and to be honest, I probably would have done the same thing if I were you, it's... alot to put on someone, anyone, I don't blame you for not going through that, especially since you and your dad changed, and I know you haven't been on good terms with your mom in years,"

Allison took in a shaking breath, squeezing her eyes shut and nodding slowly in acceptance, wrapping her arms around Scott in return and giving him a tight, squeezing hug

"I have a question," Lydia asked suddenly, successfully interrupting the moment

"Does this have anything to do with why you wanted to flatline?"

The two of them pulled apart for a moment, allowing Allison to move a strand of hair behind her ear and give a nod of affirmation

"Sort of, I know that my mom was lying to me about how my grandfather and aunt died, I don't want to ask my mom about it because she could just lie to me again so... I was sort of hoping that flatlining would ... I don't know, give me the answers I'm looking for somehow, I know that my aunt Kate and grandpa did some bad things, I know they probably hurt alot of people, but... they were still my family, and I still want to know the truth about what happened to them,"

"Your aunt's name was Kate?" Derek asked suddenly

"Yeah? Did... did you know her?"

That was a loaded question if he had ever heard one...

"I definitely knew her," he muttered back quietly, watching Allison's face pinch into an expression of confusion

He sighed quietly, eyes closing and shoulders sagging

"I knew her, I didn't know she was your aunt, she said she was from Ohio so I just... assumed it was a different Argent family, you're nothing like her and I never knew she had a neice..."

"How did you know her?" Allison pressed quietly

Derek shifted, averting his gaze and inhaling

"We need to finish this before things get any worse, trust me... you'll find out soon enough,"

 

~+~

 

Apparently there was a very good reason for Derek knowing who Liam Dunbar was

He was in Derek's _pack_

When they had come to the Hale house- newly constructed after all these years- Scott had just assumed it had been for Derek's benefit

But when he immediately walked in and asked if Liam was around...

"So..... me hurting you that day.... didn't impact you at all?" Scott asked in surprise

"Ooh it impacted me, but... kinda in a beneficial way? See when I broke my arm not only could I not play lacrosse, I couldn't really play video games either, I was stuck for six weeks without either of the things I liked to do, but I missed video games so much that I started looking into the indie computer games that I could play one-handed, and then I started looking into coding and stuff because alot of them were glitchy and... well, long story short now I'm a video game developer, wich is WAY better than being a doctor- I mean, no offense- besides that was always my dad's thing, not MY thing,"

"So.... you're happy?"

"Definitely!!"

"...And how did the werewolves play into all of this?" Stiles asked after a moment

"That's an even funnier story, on my way home from my first day at work I fell in this big hole that the construction guys had made in the street for ... some project or something, my now-girlfreind Hayden happened to be walking along and found me and wolfed out a little bit when she saved me, long story short, after a wile, I volunteered to join the pack,"

Everyone was quiet for a moment, before finally Kira, shaking her head the entire time, just said "Amazing...." under her breath

"So... you forgive me for ruining your scholarship potential?" Scott asked after a moment

"Forgive you? I should be THANKING you!"

Well, in Scott's book, that DEFINITELY counted as forgiveness...

Derek saw the gap in conversation as the perfect time to leave, heading into the kitchen where his sisters had last gone

Laura had said they were going to make cookies, he knew they'd be in there for a wile, it was the perfect place to do this... if there was such a thing

"Hey little brother, I was wondering when the smell of cookies would eventually drag you in," Laura said with a small smirk

"That.... actually isn't what dragged me in," he said quietly

God... how did he do this?

How was someone supposed to just.... confess to being solely responsible for their entire family being murdered?

"Ok..." Laura said slowly, taking a step forward and slowly kicking one of the kitchen chairs towards her brother

"You should probably sit, if it's this serious,"

"No... no I can't, just... I just need to say it,"

"Alright, then say it," Cora jumped in, grabbing the dish rag from the counter to wipe her hands on

"I'm responsible for the fire,"

There was a pause, a beat of silence passing, before Cora spoke again

"....And, how is that?"

"I'm the one who sold us out... the hunter, I.. I slept with her, I told her everything, I didn't know she was a hunter at the time and before I could find out-"

"Derek," Laura said softly, taking a step towards him

"Derek.... we knew about Kate,"

Of all the things- the many, MANY things- that she could have said to him in that moment....

That was definitely not one of the ones he expected to hear

"What...?"

"We knew, the night you came home smelling like her, Mom and I knew, and with the way you acted after the fire... I figured you felt guilty,"

"Hell even I figured you felt guilty," Cora supplied with a quiet snort

"We didn't say anything because we wanted you to have your space, come to us on your own someday if you ever wanted to but not feel pressured to, not feel like... like this was a witch hunt or anything,"

"So you knew... and yet you.... you've lived with me this entire time anyway!? How could you live with me knowing what I did!?"

"Because you didn't _do_ anything Derek,"

There were so many things he wanted to say

So many questions he wanted to ask

So many things that were going to hit the fan because of all of this

But in that moment, for just that moment, all he did was cry

 

**One month later....**

 

"And here's to Kira for passing her test, for, hopefully, the last time,"

They hadn't met in this tavern since the flatlining thing all started to begin with, but they were happy to be back, especially under such better circumstances

"You know Laura is putting on a big dinner Sunday for you right?" Derek asked simply as he took a sip of his drink

"She doesn't have to," Kira said shyly

"No, but she will, she likes doing things like that, any excuse to have a celebration..."

And, to a degree, he understood why

It was a coping mechanism for Laura, one that Derek selfishly had refused to help her indulge in until now

"Well I'm all for it, I think every day that we're alive is a reason to celebrate at this point," Stiles snorted, grabbing a cheesestick from the basket in front of him

"If this is that 'I was almost hit by a truck' story again..." Lydia sighed

"Well I was! You doctors have it SO nice and cushy working in a hospital all day, I'm out beating the streets, picking up roadkill, and it's dangerous!"

"And I'm sure your patients love being called roadkill," Scott teased

"Oh like you haven't called your patients unsavory things before," he snorted

"Ohhhh now THIS I have to hear," Allison grinned, leaning back in her seat

"OR, you could not hear it, and instead Stiles can tell everyone what he was talking to me about last night," Derek suggested

"Aww you take the fun out of everything..." the witch pouted, wrapping an arm around his boyfreind's shoulders

"BUT, Derek has a point, I do need your input on this before it gets any closer to the holidays.... how do you guys feel about a white Christmas?"

"For real!?" Kira beamed

"You can do that?" Scott asked in shock

"Sure, I still have the juice from you-know-what just like you guys do, I mean I can't promise it's gonna be city-wide or anything but hey! It'll be something!"

"It'll be something alright," Derek teased

Stiles snorted, nudging him in the ribs with his elbow and going off on some with-holding sex threat, one wich everyone there knew would never happen

The two of them were utterly addicted to eachother and Stiles was possibly worse than Derek- and that was saying alot

The conversation continued on like that, everyone joking and having a good time, but at some point Lydia started to tune out

She wasn't sure why, something just.... felt _off_

And then, it hit her

Just as another group of young doctors started walking by, one who she recognized as Erica, from their own hospital, she saw... flashes in her head

A vision of death surrounding each and every one of them, each flatlining one right after the other just like what had happened to them only weeks earlier

And this time, accompanying the flatlines, were visions of their _real_ deaths

Gruesome and gorey and without a doubt connected to the horrible experiment they were about to conduct

Lydia took in a breath, a look of horror on her face as she watched them leave the tavern

"Oh no...."


End file.
